Shy or just rude

[heidi0902]

Shy

[santa7]

If she's like I was, I suffered from anxiety and depression since I was 19.  Panic attacks and social anxiety disorder.  So, I can identify.  Sounds like your nephew is trying to get her used to meeting his family to ease out her social anxiety.  Is she nervous?  If so, then more than likely she has social phobia.

[PGS28]

I wouldn't be able to tell without meeting her.

[PGS28]

If she smiled and had pleasant mannerisms probably just shy; meeting the fam can be high pressure.

[debidoo]

I received so many awesome replies to my post and I think they were wise and understanding of my nephew's girlfriend's potential difficulties social wise.  You guys are great.   

[santa7]

To CountryGirl:  So now being shy is a medical condition? LOLOLOLOLOL

No need to be so sarcastic with the  LOL's.  Social anxiety, phobia has been around for years.

[hitch0403]

To CountryGirl:  So now being shy is a medical condition? LOLOLOLOLOL

No need to be so sarcastic with the  LOL's.  Social anxiety, phobia has been around for years.

I wouldnt worry too much about someone that thinks animals are in heaven Santa.Your answer is as good as anyone elses cos none of us were present and other factors could have contributed to this topic.

[PGS28]

I agree.

Yes, it is really, totally, rude and plain unforgivable. She thinks she doesn't have to acknowledge people, older than her. I would bring it up to your son, about her attitude.

Unforgivable? Getting a little deep in here.

[PGS28]

I absolutely agree but I also know people are raised differently.  I'd bring it up to the son and see how things go from there.

It's not rude. It's ridiculous to expect someone to feel completely comfortable people for the first time.

It doesn't have anything to do with feeling completely comfortable. If you go to someone's house you can say hello. Not go in and not speak or acknowledge anyone at all.  That is rude.  You don't have to carry on a big conversation but you can say hello.  If someone hands you a drink say thank you.  It is not that hard to smile and be nice.

[PGS28]

You're absolutely right, I just had a conversation with my 19 year old daughter about this; Idc how hard your day was you need to speak when you come into someone's presence.

I am a shy person, but as a shy person I know that is is rude to come into someones home and not even say Hello or thank you when you recieve something. I teach my children that from a young age.

[dsosnowski06]

She could very well be  very shy, maybe unsure of herself, I doubt if she was rude.  In time  and one on one she will open up. Did you ask your nephew if she is shy around  him or was it a large party that could  intimidate her. I  was shy at one time. But I got over after a bit. Part of mine was  moving  from one school to another in Ohio. People that I was  a Mexican  from Mexico instead of New Mexico and treated me like dirt. Once we got back into N.M. I opened up and  was not as shy except around new people that I had not met or was unsure of.

I don't agree with that.  I met a girl a couple years ago that came with a family member to Christmas.  I knew she would be there so I got her a gift. She opened it up and just kind of shrugged her shoulders and tossed it to the side.  She went in to another room with person she came with and would barely speak to anyone.  Someone defended her saying oh she is unsure of herself. No she was flippin rude!  I do not care how shy you are if somebody gives you a gift open your mouth and say THANK YOU.  Even if you do not like it.

I totally agree that a thank you is in order.  My grandson brought his girlfriend this year to Christmas and I made sure we had a little gift also.  I didn't want her to feel out of place when others were receiving their cards etc.  She politely said thank you and did thank us for inviting her.  I know that many time they feel uncomfortable so I always try to start a conversation to include them like where do you work or how did you meet.  Seems to draw them in

[betlynjua]

When I was very young I was extremely shy.  However, that didn't stop me from saying "please" and "thank you" whenever it was appropriate. 

In my opinion, it should never matter how shy a person is; that is no excuse for not being polite and respectful. 

I am totally turned off by disrespect and since I see it more and more, I'm turned off more and more. 

Then you wonder why I love my pets so much.  LOL   

[bremer51]

 I'd vote for shy.  If someone appears rude to me, I try to remember that not everyone is well-school in good manners and what is acceptable social interaction.

[pectacon]

It's basic manners to at least say hello to the host and a comment or two about "thanks for inviting me" or complimenting the food, the house etc. Being very shy myself, I rely heavily on making comments like those because I don't have anything else to say.

My parents were always insulted when friends I had over as a teenager didn't seek them out to say hello arriving or goodbye leaving. I think it's not a function of rudeness (my friends weren't absolute jerks) but that most people my age were just not taught to do that. Like "why would I say bye to your parents when they weren't even hanging out with us?" Not a lot of etiquette gets taught anymore.

[hitch0403]

When I was very young I was extremely shy.  However, that didn't stop me from saying "please" and "thank you" whenever it was appropriate. 

In my opinion, it should never matter how shy a person is; that is no excuse for not being polite and respectful. 

I am totally turned off by disrespect and since I see it more and more, I'm turned off more and more. 

Then you wonder why I love my pets so much.  LOL   

Hi Bet...its been over 6 months our Penny has passed.I cant tell you how many times i have relived the last night with her taking her last breath between my wife and i after i pleaded with God to do something..her suffering was so bad.We have come close to adopting but havent quite pulled the trigger yet.Keep loving those pets.