Shy or just rude

[dreamyxo]

Maybe she has a severe case of social anxiety.  It is rude to go to someone's house and not even acknowledge them.  I was shy growing up and didn't speak to a lot of people but my parents taught me manners and I was taught to speak when you are in someones house.  Just saying hi wouln't have killed her. 

[nannycoe1]

Maybe she really is shy, give her a chance

[countrygirl12]

     I think she is shy and does no have any people skills.
     Maybe she is afraid of saying the wrong things.
     I agree: She should at least say-"Nice to meet you...
     Thank you for your invitation".

There is no way you can be as old as late teens and have no people skills unless you were home schooled and never let out in public.  If you go thru school you will have some people skills.  More and more people are not shy they are just in their own world and basically buttholes.  I cannot count the number of times I see people in Walmart with earbuds stuffed in their ears.  They are not shy they just do not want to talk to anyone and figure that is a good way to get people not to talk to them.

I remember a few years ago a girl goes up to the teller at a bank and the teller speaks to her and the idiot in front of her had earphones on and when the teller speaks she goes "huuhhhh"   The teller repeated herself but I for one would not have.  I would have just sat there and looked at her.  Take the ear phones off and conduct your business or step aside.

An a similar note I worked in a fast food restaurant a long time ago and the woman comes up to the register to order and I ask "can I help you" and she is on the phone and sticks her finger in my face.  I look around her and motion for the next person and take their order.  She gets all p*ssy and starts complaining.  She was told when you get finished with your phone call and are ready to order come to the register.  LOL

This was back when everybody that had a phone had a dumb phone so she didn't have a camera she could start videoing with. lol

[mrsmere]

I thought everyone was taught to say hi, give a nod, shake hands or something when introduced.  You don't get to be in your 20's without talking to people.  She didn't have any problems talking with the nephew because they have been dating for sometime.  Just food for thought.

[aflyingmonkey]

She can't be too shy if she has a boyfriend & came with him to his family's house on Thanksgiving. At that age, mid-twenties, not to be able to muster a "hi", "nice to meet you", etc... the niceties of meeting people in their home no less, definitely shows lack of manners & shows what kind of people raised her to have no manners & the inability to be able to acquire the social skills on her own to assimilate into polite society.  Definitely rude, although perhaps not intentionally so... lack of breeding definitely. classless.

Saying something isn't going to change her, it will just put a wedge between you and her & your nephew...  let it go, but you are definitely not wrong.

[kathleenkleinhans]

I would say to not judge and give it more time.  Try and engage her gently,  Time will tell.  She may feel uncomfortable with the family, especially as though you are publicly judging her here.  No offense 

[alice44]

It sounds a little rude, but being shy is very difficult.  Those who are don't know what to say or act sometimes.  I would forget it and not let it get to you.  There are more important things in your life I am sure.

[santa7]

Not rude indeed.  I suffered incredible shyness for years around people.  It's a phobia just like any other phobia.  It's a mental condition.  It was extremely hard for me to meet new people.  I went through this through my 20's.

[countrygirl12]

I would say to not judge and give it more time.  Try and engage her gently,  Time will tell.  She may feel uncomfortable with the family, especially as though you are publicly judging her here.  No offense 

lol She isn't "publicly judging' her.  She asked a question.  And the niece has no idea this is being discussed. It ain't like she put her picture on Facebook and called her out.  She simply asked a question.  Yes it is rude to go in to someone's home and eat their food, drink their drinks, accept their hospitality and no speak to any one there.  Especially is others spoke to her. 

I would think maybe she didn't want to be there so she just had an attitude.  I would not ask her back to my home.

[countrygirl12]

Not rude indeed.  I suffered incredible shyness for years around people.  It's a phobia just like any other phobia.  It's a mental condition.  It was extremely hard for me to meet new people.  I went through this through my 20's.

So now being shy is a medical condition? LOLOLOLOLOL

[shasha2210]

I'm also shy all the time but when somebody gets me mad I be in a rude person

[autumnsparklemom]

I am a shy person but at least I am polite and say thank you if I am invited, given a gift, etc. So yes, I say rude.

[heypeg]

Even shy people have manners, there is no excuse for being rude.

[bigfoot951]

Your thoughts on this and some of the responses are interesting to me.  Depending how she acted, I could see how it might be considered rude, but by no means could I come to that decision by what you said.  Some people grow out of shyness, but some get even more shy with age.  With how you described it, it doesn't sound rude.  I would have had to been there to know for sure though.

[santa7]

Social Anxiety Disorder or Social Phobia is more common then you may realize.