elderly

[hensleyll]

wow quite a few typos sorry have a 23 month old grabbing th keys

[lgemini]

I have a mother that is the same way.  I had to face the truth, and so did my siblings.

[hensleyll]

well her daughter finally signed her up for adult daycare and there is nurses on call all day

[hensleyll]

apparently she hasnt got all her ducts in a row she hasnt gone back to work yet ,but i tried to talk to her and she wouldnt hear it

[catherinedwhite]

My Mom needs care now but she will not go.  I feel it is my responsibility to keep her happy in her home.

[freedavis]

Parents overall get worst at letting you care for them as they get older.  Sometimes you have to let them fall some before they realize its time to get your help.  Pride is such a hard thing for older people.  You parents should embrace your help as they raised you.

[BMaston12]

how do you convince a person thir parent is getting to the point they need special care,i take car of a 98 yr old lady and her daughtr refused to accepts she cant hardly walk or feed herself

Denial or she just doesn't want to see her in a nursing home. I could not put my husband in a nursing home before he died of cancer. I took care of him at home with hospice until God took him home. It was hard, but I could not let him die alone, and he didn't.
BMaston12

[hensleyll]

i understand her wanting to keep her home but what i tried to tell her she needed someone trained i dont even know how to take a pulse

[king4cash]

Another important aspect of care-giving is to take a few days, when possible. Taking care of a loved one is a huge responsibility and you need a break from the demands. It is not only very difficult physically, but also mentally and emotionally.

[mary33716]

It really hazard most time family go into deni
And all you can do explains how important this is if elderly affair get involved it not good so I'm in that situation my mom finally in a Alf and I feel so better know care around her 24hr

[hensleyll]

so update I quit she is sending her mom to adult daycare and paying a neighbor triple what she was paying me for 2 h in morning I was their for 12 hr every day ,but her other family says she enjoys the daycare im glad she good woman ad getting more alert now that she getting out of that chair she sat in every da or12 hrs i wasn't even allowed to take her to porch,like I was in beginning

[loulizlee]

I'm glad you have your life back, but I had a thought after reading your original post again.  If the mother is 98, the daughter is probably up in years herself.  Maybe she is beginning to be senile herself.

[hensleyll]

Thought about that.  But she works as passport and id personal on navy base surely someone would have noticed that

[ricdsm]

You can't convince someone of something they don't want to know.  There is a form of therapy called Motivational Interviewing that you might research.  MI is about helping the person "discover" the point for themselves.  It is very effective in many situations.

[BMaston12]

how do you convince a person thir parent is getting to the point they need special care,i take car of a 98 yr old lady and her daughtr refused to accepts she cant hardly walk or feed herself

I think it is hard for relatives to think of their loved ones declining. Sometimes the truth is not an acceptable option. But with the right handling, I think that you can convince her by letting her watch her parent and make notes of the declines and explain how she is not helping the parent by continuing to ignore the problem. In fact, the parent is probably worse off without the special help she needs. Sometimes that special actually helps them get better. Good Luck.
BMaston12