Shopping at Walmart

[sherryinutah]

This little story made me smile.   

After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Walmart. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse.

Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Walmart

Dear Mrs. Woolf,

Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Woolf, are listed below and are "documented by our video surveillance cameras":

1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-
minute intervals.

3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the
women's restroom.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official
voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the
employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted in management getting involved causing management to lose time and costing the company money.

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to reserve a bag of
chips.

6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the
children shoppers they could come in if they would bring pillows and
blankets from the bedding department - to which twenty children
obliged.

8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began
crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
Emergency Medics were called.

9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

10. September 10: While handling guns in the Sports department, he
asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

11. October 3: Darted around the Store suspiciously while loudly
humming the ' Mission Impossible' theme.

12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.

13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed
through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

14. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed the fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!

15. Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where the fitting room was.

And last, but not least:

16. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited
awhile, and then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in
here.' One of the Staff passed out.

I wonder if I'll have to go along on many more shopping trips?

[bonzie]

Oh no, is this a real story, its funny and sad at the same time.

[amaravee]

im sure its just a fun story, not real... although some people might have done one of these.
great little story, thanks for sharing!

[monnee]

They need to keep their shelves fully stock with products, have prices on shelves, and expand their narrow aisles wider so the aisles won't be so tight for shoppers to shop.

[Phx0808]

I loved it! I have already shared it with 5 other people. Thanks

[rpse1927]

i really enjoy shopping at walmart. has everything there and prices are low

[Delphyne]

Oh no, is this a real story, its funny and sad at the same time.

No.  It is not a real story.  Variations of it have circled the internet for years.  It is a cute story, though.

 

[sharg]

  it gave me a great laugh and I pictured my husband pulling some of these pranks.  Thanks again for putting a smile on my face.

[bigedshult]

If some one did that store. I think this is not very nice story. If it's true you should have to pay a fine store. For interrupting the business of the store and bothering the store customers. You should have to go under counseling his own expense to find out how he could be so rude. It's very story if it's not true!

[vickysue]

Yeah my hubby doesn't really like to shop at stores either. And he gets in my way. So i have stared making him a small list to go find, somestime a little tricky about where they are. Like today he came hunting me up twice because he couldn't find something. Well tole him about where to look and lo and behold by the time i was through he finally finished up. Was a whole lot easier. Folks i don't just by a little becuse the walmart we went to was 120 miles form home. But had to go see my doctor. I usually buy for a month to a month and a half each time.  Save a lot of money then buying it here at our rinky dink store.

[sgluckadoo]

Well that gives me some great ideas for my next shopping trip

[longinojoshua]

This little story made me smile.   

After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Walmart. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse.

Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Walmart

Dear Mrs. Woolf,

Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Woolf, are listed below and are "documented by our video surveillance cameras":

1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-
minute intervals.

3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the
women's restroom.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official
voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the
employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted in management getting involved causing management to lose time and costing the company money.

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to reserve a bag of
chips.

6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the
children shoppers they could come in if they would bring pillows and
blankets from the bedding department - to which twenty children
obliged.

8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began
crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
Emergency Medics were called.

9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

10. September 10: While handling guns in the Sports department, he
asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

11. October 3: Darted around the Store suspiciously while loudly
humming the ' Mission Impossible' theme.

12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.

13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed
through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

14. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed the fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!

15. Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where the fitting room was.

And last, but not least:

16. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited
awhile, and then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in
here.' One of the Staff passed out.

I wonder if I'll have to go along on many more shopping trips?

[champak97]

That was both funny and unbelievable, can't imagine a person would do all these things.

[alamedann]

Thanks for sharing this, I had not seen it before.  It's very funny--and has given me some new ideas for what to do on my next shopping trip! 

[ancmetro]

    Watch some stories on YouTube about Walmart shopping.