PAlease can someone help me to understand?

[Cuppycake]

It sounds like she has issues and deserves to be alone. If she can't be bothered to have a caring friend as you then she doesn't deserve to have you as a friend.

[cateyes1]

It sounds like she has issues and deserves to be alone. If she can't be bothered to have a caring friend as you then she doesn't deserve to have you as a friend.

Thank you cuppycake 

[cateyes1]

Cateyes I'm not really sure I understand what she is upset about.

Is she upset because you're not calling her first before you stop by to see her at home or at work? If that's the case, then I can understand that, I personally don't like people coming by my house without calling first, and someone coming to see me when I'm at work would be something I wouldn't want at any time.

If that's what she's upset about, then I get it but if she's upset simply because you didn't call her when she's perfectly able to make a phone call herself, well then that sounds like someone who I wouldn't have as a friend.

Hun she is upset because I dont call her period...but I have called her a couple of times last year, she insists on NOT calling me for some reason...I wrote her an email this morning after trying to contact her by phone a few times with no answer...I just told her goodbye and that she is no better than I am and I didnt feel I deserve to be treated the way she did the other day...I hate being mean but I have put up with this ALL of our friendship if thats what you want to call it....oh well the ball is in her court now.

[vonnell60]

I have known my friend for 40 years. She is the type that she wont call you unless you call her first UGH. She is a nurse and works right down the hall to where my primary Dr is and I ALWAYS try and make a visit to her when I see my Dr. well yesterday I went to see my Dr and as usual I asked to see her after. granted I maybe only called her a couple times last year, so anyways she says to me, " all I asked was for you to call me, have a nice day and then walked away" prior to that we chatted for a few moments and I told her how I went to my Mom and Dads grave a few weeks ago and where she only lives like 2 minutes away I droped by her house (being in the area) altho her car was there she didnt answer. well she did tell me she was home and knew I dropped by but she didnt answer the door because I didnt call her first grrrrrrrr...I told her I was in the area after going to see my Mom and Dad so I thought i'd drop by and say hello. her response was " oh you werent just coming to see me you just happened to be in the area" THAT is when she said "all I ask was for you to call me" and then turned and walked away....now my question to ANYONE who will answer is? is it me? or does SHE have issues?....thank you!!

IT seems to me that she have issues the call can go either way she can call you just you can call her dont worry.

[cateyes1]

I have known my friend for 40 years. She is the type that she wont call you unless you call her first UGH. She is a nurse and works right down the hall to where my primary Dr is and I ALWAYS try and make a visit to her when I see my Dr. well yesterday I went to see my Dr and as usual I asked to see her after. granted I maybe only called her a couple times last year, so anyways she says to me, " all I asked was for you to call me, have a nice day and then walked away" prior to that we chatted for a few moments and I told her how I went to my Mom and Dads grave a few weeks ago and where she only lives like 2 minutes away I droped by her house (being in the area) altho her car was there she didnt answer. well she did tell me she was home and knew I dropped by but she didnt answer the door because I didnt call her first grrrrrrrr...I told her I was in the area after going to see my Mom and Dad so I thought i'd drop by and say hello. her response was " oh you werent just coming to see me you just happened to be in the area" THAT is when she said "all I ask was for you to call me" and then turned and walked away....now my question to ANYONE who will answer is? is it me? or does SHE have issues?....thank you!!

IT seems to me that she have issues the call can go either way she can call you just you can call her dont worry.

Thank you hun, this was REALLY bothering me but since I wrote her an email this morning I feel sooooo much better to have gotten it off my chest

[jordandog]

It sounds like she has issues and deserves to be alone. If she can't be bothered to have a caring friend as you then she doesn't deserve to have you as a friend.

After reading what you added onto this ie her being the godmother, etc., I couldn't agree more with what Cuppycake wrote! You know who you are and you have always come across on here as a very caring and giving woman. It is her loss, not to want you in her life unless it falls within 'her rules' for friendship. I was told a very long time ago that once you sincerely apologize and it is NOT accepted, move on. Why waste your time and your 'guilty feelings' on anyone who doesn't realize what they are losing by not having you in their life? Put that energy into the people who really know and appreciate you.

[cateyes1]

It sounds like she has issues and deserves to be alone. If she can't be bothered to have a caring friend as you then she doesn't deserve to have you as a friend.

After reading what you added onto this ie her being the godmother, etc., I couldn't agree more with what Cuppycake wrote! You know who you are and you have always come across on here as a very caring and giving woman. It is her loss, not to want you in her life unless it falls within 'her rules' for friendship. I was told a very long time ago that once you sincerely apologize and it is NOT accepted, move on. Why waste your time and your 'guilty feelings' on anyone who doesn't realize what they are losing by not having you in their life? Put that energy into the people who really know and appreciate you.


Thank you Jordan 

[tantricia44]

CateyesI'm wondering how well do you know this friend. Is she always like this the time you've known her? Is she going through that change that women find so annoying b/c hormones are going wacko. Or is just the type that like things planned out. I'm the planner type, if in the last minute I get called to go out I usually decline b/c I'm not emotionally into a spontaneous unplanned date. I have to be in the mood or I can't just drop everything for an unplanned outing. Just ask you friend what is the deal & clear the confusion.

[cateyes1]

CateyesI'm wondering how well do you know this friend. Is she always like this the time you've known her? Is she going through that change that women find so annoying b/c hormones are going wacko. Or is just the type that like things planned out. I'm the planner type, if in the last minute I get called to go out I usually decline b/c I'm not emotionally into a spontaneous unplanned date. I have to be in the mood or I can't just drop everything for an unplanned outing. Just ask you friend what is the deal & clear the confusion.

Hi Tantricia, she has ALWAYS been like this. I feel as tho she thinks because she is a nurse dont get me wrong I give ANYONE in the medical field ALOT of credit...but I went into retail...I feel i'm just a peeon associate to her and she thinks she sh*** icecream...just my feelings

[mawhite63]

Hun she is upset because I dont call her period...but I have called her a couple of times last year, she insists on NOT calling me for some reason...I wrote her an email this morning after trying to contact her by phone a few times with no answer...I just told her goodbye and that she is no better than I am and I didnt feel I deserve to be treated the way she did the other day...I hate being mean but I have put up with this ALL of our friendship if thats what you want to call it....oh well the ball is in her court now.

Good for you!

You are most certainly NOT being mean! You're taking care of yourself and getting rid of what sounds like a very toxic person who adds no value. Life is too short to deal with people who drain your emotions. Your friends should build you up, not make you feel unsettled or confused.  ((((Hugs))))

[cateyes1]

Hun she is upset because I dont call her period...but I have called her a couple of times last year, she insists on NOT calling me for some reason...I wrote her an email this morning after trying to contact her by phone a few times with no answer...I just told her goodbye and that she is no better than I am and I didnt feel I deserve to be treated the way she did the other day...I hate being mean but I have put up with this ALL of our friendship if thats what you want to call it....oh well the ball is in her court now.

Good for you!

You are most certainly NOT being mean! You're taking care of yourself and getting rid of what sounds like a very toxic person who adds no value. Life is too short to deal with people who drain your emotions. Your friends should build you up, not make you feel unsettled or confused.  ((((Hugs))))


Thank you sooooooo much for that, oh and how I sooooooo needed that hug ...thank you thank you 

[sdenimandlace1]

Wow, what a lot of work for that friendship. I quess I would tell her the phone work both ways.

[cateyes1]

Wow, what a lot of work for that friendship. I quess I would tell her the phone work both ways.

I did that hun but she does not care one bit, I washed my hands of her.

[mardukblood2009]

I have or had a similar experience. This can't be the first time your friend has acted like this. It has to be an on going thing whether you are aware of it or not. It sounds like she is jealous of you. It could really be anything. I would move on. There are 7 billion other people in the world, I am sure you can find someone else to be friends with or at least talk to.
 

[cateyes1]

I have or had a similar experience. This can't be the first time your friend has acted like this. It has to be an on going thing whether you are aware of it or not. It sounds like she is jealous of you. It could really be anything. I would move on. There are 7 billion other people in the world, I am sure you can find someone else to be friends with or at least talk to. :thumbsup



Hi, Like I said above, I have moved on  ....thank you