Being the first-born child... good or bad?

[leung1245]

I'm the first born of four children... and trust me... my parents are VERY hard on me and my siblings can get away from so many silly things that I can't. I understand being the oldest child means big responsibility and role model to the younger ones, but it annoys me that even now when my siblings are much older, I'm still the one to have higher expectations...

[velvet53]

I am the first born of my dad's children. Even though I was a girl he taught me the things that he would teach a son. I am glad now that he did but back then I wasn't happy about it. I really had no complaints of being his oldest.

[champak97]

I agree! Being the first child requires  a lot of responsibility and sometimes I think parents are so hard on their first kid, and the kids that are born last enjoy the most freedom and get parents love the most.

[candyterrius]

I'm the first born of four children... and trust me... my parents are VERY hard on me and my siblings can get away from so many silly things that I can't. I understand being the oldest child means big responsibility and role model to the younger ones, but it annoys me that even now when my siblings are much older, I'm still the one to have higher expectations...

Ah! This is very common in the Chinese culture. The old tradition of thinking the eldest child must be a good role model so their younger siblings will follow theirs. I know this very well. It might be unpleasant for the time being, but at least you can see this as you are being “loved” and well-trained, well grounded, because you are “special!” 

[meyerkendra]

I am the oldest of three I am a girl, and I have two younger brothers, I am 28 they are 26 and 15. I got it the hardest. I was a good kid too. But they still rode the crap out of me. My brother f'd up right and left, and he still gets more attnetion from my parents then I do. I don't get it. But I find myself doing the same thing with my two. I am really hard on my 9 year old. I love here to pieces but I just have really high expectations. Then my 18 month old is the baby and he's my last baby so I baby the crap out of him. I try not to be so hard on her sometimes but I find myself doin it anyways.

[vicogden]

I'm a middle kid and happy to be.  I have a younger and an older sister.  I certainly didn't envy my older sister having to babysit my kid sister and I when my parents went out, so I have to agree that expectations were higher, at least at a younger age.  As adults I don't think the difference is significant, but as kids my older sister seemed to have it pretty rough... she got a large load of responsibility without much of a pay-off...

[mrisha]

I am the first born of 10  children and believe me it wasn't easy, I hated it.  I was made to be the babysitter, doing all the hard work around the house.  I think that is the reason today that I like my own company instead of being around so many people.  With that many kids around, you never had any privacy.

[bigfoot951]

I think it is all relative and completely depends on how spread out the kids are.  We only know our own experiences and it seems like most people no matter which sibling(first, middle, youngest) seem to think they had the raw end of the deal.

[tashamjoy]

I am not the oldest i am the middle i have an older sister and a younger sister and brother and i did see that she had some but i am 20 and she is 21 and my younger siblings are 13 and 11 so we were both around the same age both would babysit and stuff she may have had a little more responsibility but i feel it just depends on the parents but i feel each person in the kids have their own good and bad things the older can have responsibilty and guinee pig middle feels ignored younger they may not care anymore or dont want them to leave them so many things i guess it just depends

[mattc4000]

I'm going to have to straddle the fence on this one.  I was the first born and therefore had some preferential treatment as the only child and therefore got lots of attention and was spoiled.  However, all the "mistakes" were also made with me and the opinions and actions have changed as my brother and sister were born.

[Storm61115]

i dont know but my brother thinks he can get everything and has got everything before me even though i am the first born.

[astrozier1]

Cool to find a post like this on fushioncash. I have been trying to find the meaning of the first born child and so far it is trending that the first born child has it harder. because not only are we the first born but we are often times the first to do something in the family that has never been done in the family before.

[amstewart]

I'm a 1st born and felt I was always expected to be the more responsible one and had to take care of my brother.  When I had my 1st child I devoted all of my time/attention to him and he was the center of my world.  I felt badly that his brothers never got that extra one-on-one time, but now my youngest seems to get the most attention because he's still small.   The oldest feels like we are harder on him and has to set the example.  I guess it depends on the life phase, number of siblings, etc...  Regardless of birth order we love our kids the best we can and try to show it.  We do the best we can to make them each feel special and important and pray they will grow up to be well-adjusted adults.  Hug your kids today!!

[bretay]

I agree.I am the oldest of 5.And if they did something wrong,it was my fault.I didn't stop it and I was supposed to the one in charge.And its still the same way.I am 50 and the youngest is 35.Sometimes being oldest was not all it's cracked up to be.The younger ones got by with so much more stuff than I did.I could so the same thing they did and I would get into trouble,but not them.So funny.

[madeara]

I am a first born child.  My siblings and I are very close.  Being a first born child is terrific!