how do you get your kids to grow up 17and up

[sharrol1]

i have 5 kids one and some of them dont want to grow up 18 year and a17 year and thay like to drive me crazy

[dreamyxo]

People grow and mature at different rates.  They sometimes grow up because they have to.  How are you treating them?  Do you still baby them?  If you enable them and treat them like helpless babies they have no reason to have to grow up because they know mommy will be there to bail them out.  Sometimes you have to help people be independent by showing tough love. 

[shandana]

I have a son who will turn 16 this year, and what I have done for him is to give him a little resopnsibility at at time. By my son being so close to 18, I'm going to have to bump up the responsibility and be stern and vigilent (don't give up or say it is easier for me to do it myself) in order to have him as prepared as I can when he turns 18. Your children are a tad older and I'm not really sure how much you allow them to do, but if they are big babies, as much as it might hurt you to, you may have to give them responsibilities one at a time and really not let up. If this is theirs to do then they must do it or figure out a way to make it work. If you plan for them to be mature adults then these are things that they must know how to handle. I'm not saying to push them out and let them figure everything out for themselves. But what I am saying is that there is a very thin line between guiding them when needed to, verses being so quick to jump in and help (take over) when they struggle a bit as to not allow them time to figure things out and to know that you're serious when you tell them that this is your responsibility, I'll just be an advisor.

[tantricia44]

sharrol1 Sighhhh.......should have started them from the cradle. I mean I wish my parents did the same to me. Life would have been smoother had they raised me by gradually teaching me to be independent & responsible. Mom hovered over me so much that I was & still afraid to do new things. After I finished college, I stayed at home & just laid around, everyday, mom keeps on telling me get a job, get a job. Why should I get one, I have free room/board,cable, food.....One day, mom & dad kicked me, the dog, the cat, &  the hamster OUT to get my own apartment. Thus, started my road to responsibly & independence. If you haven't started training them from the cradle you might have to use what my parents did to me good old tough love. Kick them out of the nest & it's up to them if they fly or not. Good Luck!

[sherryinutah]

i have 5 kids one and some of them dont want to grow up 18 year and a17 year and thay like to drive me crazy

One thing to consider is whether or not your child has a disability.  Some kids are never really able to deal with adult responsibilities if they are disabled.

Another thing is to make sure that you don't do too much for them.  They need to have their own good and bad experiences so they can learn.  

Consider their specific situation and abilities and then step back.  Let them trip and fall as they learn.  Tell them what their options are and let them choose with the understanding that there will be benefits and consequences that accompany their personal choices.

[masked_brown_guy]

maybe you are just a bad parent.