Is it wrong to have kids outside of marriage

[JoselinTorres]

I'm a 24 year old  and people always ask me when I'm going to have a child and my response has always been that after I get married I'll have kids. The other day I bumped into someone I knew from an old job and she asked me and I told her I wasn't even in a relationship at the moment. She then started telling me how her boyfriend and her weren't ready for marriage but they have two kids and are trying for number 3 . In my mind I was thinking how can you not be ready for marriage but are totally ready to have kid. At least if a marriage doesn't work out you can get a divorce, but kids are a life long commitment. I guess I just don't understand that type of reasoning . I would love to hear others opinions on the subject thou.

[alwaysinstyle]

wel,i think i agree.i was in the same situation and first i got our baby than 2 moths after we got married.i mean we are together anyways.

[wiersmak]

You have a good head on your shoulders.  I completely agree, its putting the cart before the horse! I definately dont understand having kids with someone you're not willing to make a lifelong commitment to.

[queenofnines]

Don't let ANYONE pressure you into having kids, or getting married, if you don't really want these things.  People are just simple-minded, and so they ask dumb, cliche questions about spawning.  It will only get worse if you do get married and don't have kids!

People who choose not to add to the overpopulation of our world get a gold   .  

[dreamyxo]

I don't think it's wrong.  I don't think it's exactly ideal depending on the circumstances.  If two mature stable people are in a committed stable relationship regardless of having a piece of paper or not, and are dedicated to bringing a child into the world that they will love and try to provide a stable home for then sure go for it do what you want. 

[tzs]

If you both love eachother and desire to have kids, marriage is just a piece of paper........The joy of a child lasts forever.....

[nisha1010]

Just look at Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell - they were living together for over a decade and had kids without being married to each other and being completely in love..... If you can afford to have a kid and are willing to take responsibility for it - hey why not?

[rkjones100]

Always wrong.  You need to save yourself until you get married, than it's not even an issue.

[bschumacher]

I think that people with children should be married. This gives the kids a sense of security and further unites the couple. If they go to Vegas, it's easy, cheap, and fun. No one needs to have a big fat expensive wedding.

[noirlupe]

I did it the right way marriage than kids.  I thought is was a good marriage.  Then he started coming home with "Dot this and Dot that"  come to find out Dot was his lunch trist.  Dot took my husband and now they are married. I lost my husband and ended up a single Mom of 4.  I dont see how marriage helped me have a relationships the way I was raised (my parents were married 54 years before Dad Died) to have it,  marriage doesnt always work out the way you plan for it to. 

[jazzgal]

Heck yes! It is wrong to have affairs with people who are not your spouse, and definitely wrong to have sexual intercourse with them! It is damaging to the children you had with your spouse, and damaging to your spouse!

[Cuppycake]

Always wrong.  You need to save yourself until you get married, than it's not even an issue.

LOL

[kords21]

Every situation is different, very rarely are things in black and white. I personally wouldn't have kids if my overall sitation is ready for it. I don't think it's anyone's place to cast judegement on others. I think it's up to the inidividual to decide if it's wrong or not

[drmotroni]

I think it is alot easier if there is the commitment of marriage.

[queenofnines]

I did it the right way marriage than kids.

"The right way"?   

Ugh.  I hate when people state their opinion as fact.  You offended millions of happy, unmarried couples with that comment, as well as single moms and dads.