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Topic: I need advice  (Read 5591 times)

ButterflyWings

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I need advice
« on: July 20, 2010, 11:12:12 am »
Okay I am really stuck..But I really need outside advice. K here it goes ugh..
I stepped away from a friend who was not a good friend to me we are talking needy and selfish..We stopped talking cause it got to bad for my heart to handle.
it has been a year and I think of her a lot ( i care to much one of my many faults) So the other day she calls me out of the blue..Not thinking I pick up and talk to her.The conversation was pleasant and I was happy to hear from her..But then she called back like insanely over the next few days.And half *bleep* apologized for her actions in our friendship I say half *bleep* cause she pointed out how people thought I was a *bleep*..

So enough babbling I miss her and hate the thought of never talking again but at the same time I do not want to be the person in the end hurting for a person who may not give two shits about me and only cares about herself..So I need help how would you handle this without letting yourself get hurt or end up feeling like you opened a door to a friendship from hell??

home_teachin

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Re: I need advice
« Reply #1 on: July 20, 2010, 11:55:53 am »
If she is already on your nerves, I wouldn't answer the phone to her again. Just cut it off and leave it that way. People don't change.

mc1962

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Re: I need advice
« Reply #2 on: July 20, 2010, 12:52:07 pm »
If it walks like a duck then it must be a duck.  Things are better left in the past but its up to you.

ancmetro

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Re: I need advice
« Reply #3 on: July 20, 2010, 01:34:40 pm »
     ;)    Like in any other relationship...   :(  If the person is not your friend...that person is your foe!...It is time to move on!

ButterflyWings

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Re: I need advice
« Reply #4 on: July 20, 2010, 02:24:49 pm »
Thanks guys I knew this but hearing it from a outside source helps tremendously!! thanks :heart: :peace:

Falconer02

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Re: I need advice
« Reply #5 on: July 20, 2010, 02:54:09 pm »
I'm in a similar situation with a girl. I just cut her off after she literally blew up at me after I said she was being very selfish (I introduced the topic very calmly and not bluntly-- it was getting out of hand with her). We haven't talked in almost two years. I do think about her once in a while-- usually because I see her as my whole family is friends with her. The fact that she called you back and apologized is brave and nice... but since you see signs of her acting like her same-old bitchy and nuerotic self, you should ditch her. You're better off.

 :star: :star: :star:TRUST RANDOM INTERNET PEOPLE! WE KNOW EVERYTHING!  :star: :star: :star:

mrisha

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Re: I need advice
« Reply #6 on: July 20, 2010, 03:00:22 pm »
It sounds like this person is causing you a lot of stress.  Its  time to call it quits and move on.  Life is too short to allow a whack job to destroy your peace of mind.
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jusu

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Re: I need advice
« Reply #7 on: July 20, 2010, 03:43:11 pm »
It is best to leave it in the past and move on. Sometimes it's just too hard to pick-up where you left off and start over. If it wasn't a joyful happy feeling hearing her voice again...over and over, then don't force it.

Cuppycake

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Re: I need advice
« Reply #8 on: July 20, 2010, 03:47:42 pm »
I agree completely with the others. If you have doubts about her you should just keep things as they were.

hemapreethaa

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Re: I need advice
« Reply #9 on: July 20, 2010, 04:22:43 pm »
I totally agree with everyone too..... Yes, if u r not happy talking to someone, forget it, thatz it, you have to be happy and it shud be pleasure to move with a person, if not itz of no use to talk to that person...... thatz what i wud do.

brendy1990

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Re: I need advice
« Reply #10 on: July 20, 2010, 05:12:33 pm »
I agree completely with the others. If you have doubts about her you should just keep things as they were.
i agree with cuppycake

rbeal2324

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Re: I need advice
« Reply #11 on: July 20, 2010, 05:15:41 pm »
I agree with most of the posts.  i feel your pain but you are better off if you dont start up again. 

dreamyxo

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Re: I need advice
« Reply #12 on: July 20, 2010, 06:40:38 pm »
She made an attempt and I would accept her apology however half assed you think she was being but she reached out and called after a long time.  Accept it but you are not obligated to continue to be her friend.  Take it as a learning lesson and remember the old saying about people being in your life for a reason, season and lifetime.  Some friendships aren't meant to last forever.  Maybe this has run its course.


Quote
A   R E A S O N   A   S E A S O N   O R   A   L I F E T I M E

People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime.  When you figure out which it is, you know exactly what to do.

When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed outwardly or inwardly.  They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually.  They may seem like a godsend, and they are.  They are there for the reason you need them to be.  Then, without any wrong doing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.  Sometimes they die.  Sometimes they walk away.  Sometimes they act up or out and force you to take a stand.  What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled;  their work is done.  The prayer you sent up has been answered and it is now time to move on.

When people come into your life for a SEASON, it is because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn.  They may bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.  They may teach you something you have never done.  They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.  Believe it!  It is real!  But, only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons; those things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.  Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person/people (anyway);  and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.  It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

ButterflyWings

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Re: I need advice
« Reply #13 on: July 20, 2010, 08:04:56 pm »
Thank to all especially Falcon  ;D to hear someone who has been through a similar situation..I think know what is best..I do see the same stuff happening I hear it in her voice and apology or not you do not apologize with a but after..that's back handed to me..I admit when I am in the wrong and own up to it so moving on is better I deserve someone who can be a friend not someone who is out to hurt or use me again..Thanks all Smooches :heart: :notworthy:

lynnc35

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Re: I need advice
« Reply #14 on: July 20, 2010, 09:16:57 pm »
You need to be straightforth no beating around the bushes, tell her you love her, and respect her as a friend in your life, you don't want to lose that, but the other stuff has to stop. You do not want to hear what is going on around you, you will be her friend, if she keeps it just that. Tell her that is the way we can be friends, she will then either accept it or reject it, and if she rejects it, you got to let it go and forgive her, she may realize her mistake and realize what you said at a later time, after thinking it over then come back to you.

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