Sticky Question

[pamela32280]

If you are in a relationship with someone with addiction, whether it be alcohol or drugs, and you do love them, and they are trying their best to be sober and don't commit crimes or anything like that should you stay in the relationship or get out while you can?

[animikokala]

If they are making an effort to change, then stay with them.  Abandoning them if they are trying would most likely cause them to quit trying.  But if they refuse to change it's up to you.  How much do you love them?  Are you willing to put up with it?  If not, leave.

And it has to be genuine effort to change, not just saying that they will.

[Mikena]

 : :wave:That is a hard question to answer! I guess it would depend on what you may have already experienced with this other person due to their addiction. If they are really trying to change and are being honest with you ; then I say stay with them and be their support. But if you find out that they are not being honest and just have been stringing you along, then by all means do what you got to do !!! After all ; life is too short to be in a one sided relationship.

[Oryon20]

Everyone has demons in some form or another.  I think as long as they are sincerely and seriously trying to become sober, aren't committing crimes, aren't blowing your savings on things, and aren't being physically or mentally abusive to their partner and/or children, then I can't see a reason to leave that person if you truly love them.  Everyone needs support in battling their issues.

Of course, things can change as time progresses, in which case you'd need to re-evalute the circumstances.  But as you described the situation, if it were me in the situation, I wouldn't abandon them if I truly loved them.

[BK_Adores_Chase]

If it's not hurting you or your family in any way, then honestly, who cares.  My fiance smokes weed everyday and I could care less.  It doesn't affect our family negatively - he works hard and that's how he chooses to spend his extra money.

[dreamyxo]

A lot of if's would be involved.  It would depend on how long I was with them and if they became addicted after I started the relationship or if they were addicted before.  If I was fortunate enough to see warning signs that they are addictive I would not have gotten into a relationship with them in the first place.  If they became addicts after the relationship started in the beginning stages I would be friends with them and help them when I could but I would not continue a romantic relationship.  If I was going out with them for a while and I really loved them and wanted a future with them I would stay and help them out but that would only be a point.  If they became abusive towards me or if they started committing crimes I would leave.  I would not put up with that.

[texaswhiterose]

If they are truly trying to change then your support is very much needed. But if they just keep saying they are going to change but never make the effort then it is time to cut the strings and let them go.

[raven1114]

i think it depends on how bad the addiction is and how it's effecting your day to day life. I man are they taking money and blowing so much of i on their addiction that bill can' be paid? Are they so drunk, high, stoned, etc that they hardly spend any quality time with the family? Situations like that then i'd have to leave even if they were trying to get clean.