What's it like to be incarcerated?

[sherryinutah]

A couple of days before Christmas my best friend was arrested.  He'd been intimately involved with 2 different women who were his neighbors.  Being in a triangle can be a big mess.  He's single with a disability so he thought he had the luxury of being in a relationship with both women.

There was a lot of gossip, drama and chaos until the women joined forces and stabbed him in the back.

One woman had loaned him DVD's when she came over to visit him.  Later...she filed a police report claiming that the DVD's were stolen out of her apartment so, needless to say, he is being charged with burglary.

He's in a county jail right now and I've never been locked up.  What's it like?  Anyone have experience where they were falsely accused of committing a crime?

When my friend was 14 years old a very large tree fell on him and it was equivalent to being struck by lightning.  He died 3 times.  Now he relies on Social Security Income.

He's getting ready to lose his apartment and everything in it.  If he's locked up for 30 days or longer he'll temporarily lose his SSI.  I'm doing whatever I can to learn how to help him.

Any information you can offer is greatly appreciated.  Oh...and...Happy New Year. 

[loulizlee]

I've never been incarcerated and hope to avoid that situation.  I understand he does not have much income but can he get a lawyer?  That is the only thing I know to suggest - a lawyer, court-appointed or otherwise.  That is a pretty crummy thing to do to him, even though I'm sure they thought he deserved it.

[Lindaroof]

I have never put myself in a position to be incarcerated, but it sounds to me like maybe someone should have been watching out for this guy if he is mentally challenged. But he may not be as bad as some may think if he has 2 women on the hook and playing them both. Not a very nice thing to do. He wouldn't want that done to him.

[bleyd]

I never been in jail. So I dont know whats its like. Maybe he needs to get a lawyer? check if your state has legal aid services for low income people.

[Nancy5]

I agree with everyone.  I assume he has little or no money to get a lawyer.  He needs to have one to protect his interest.  Go to legal services and get him a court appointed lawyer ASAP.

[countrygirl12]

A couple of days before Christmas my best friend was arrested.  He'd been intimately involved with 2 different women who were his neighbors.  Being in a triangle can be a big mess.  He's single with a disability so he thought he had the luxury of being in a relationship with both women.

There was a lot of gossip, drama and chaos until the women joined forces and stabbed him in the back.

One woman had loaned him DVD's when she came over to visit him.  Later...she filed a police report claiming that the DVD's were stolen out of her apartment so, needless to say, he is being charged with burglary.

He's in a county jail right now and I've never been locked up.  What's it like?  Anyone have experience where they were falsely accused of committing a crime?

When my friend was 14 years old a very large tree fell on him and it was equivalent to being struck by lightning.  He died 3 times.  Now he relies on Social Security Income.

He's getting ready to lose his apartment and everything in it.  If he's locked up for 30 days or longer he'll temporarily lose his SSI.  I'm doing whatever I can to learn how to help him.

Any information you can offer is greatly appreciated.  Oh...and...Happy New Year. 

A tree fell on him and it is the same as being struck by lightening?  That does not make sense.  Anyway, I have never been in jail but it obviously is not too bad because people don't seem to care to go over and over.  They get 3 meals a day, a bed, cable tv, internet access, weight rooms, and a lot more luxuries than the working people have.

So is he just disabled from the tree falling on him or does he have mental problems?  It is pretty crappy that she would loan him the DVD's and then say he stole them.  Did he tell his side of that?  Looks like it's his word against hers.  How can she prove the DVD's were hers?  Or that he took them?  People are evil and you can't trust anyone anymore.

[countrygirl12]

I have never put myself in a position to be incarcerated, but it sounds to me like maybe someone should have been watching out for this guy if he is mentally challenged. But he may not be as bad as some may think if he has 2 women on the hook and playing them both. Not a very nice thing to do. He wouldn't want that done to him.

She did not say he was mentally challenged.  And if he were I doubt he would be dating 2 women. 

And I have never heard of a situation where if you are arrested and don't have any money you can't get a freebie lawyer.  If she reported the DVD's as stolen and he had them then there probably is not a lot he will be able to do.  I am curious as to how many DVDs we are talking about because you don't usually go to jail for a long period of time for petty theft.  Also curious how he would lose his disability because they people who send the check won't know he has been arrested.  And as I use to work in a bank I know that most of the SSI checks are more than I make in 2 months so usually they have money.  And second, the money was just direct deposited into their account and nobody from the government was checking to see if they came and drew it all out but $1 the day it went in.

[linderlizzie]

You play; you pay. He'll have to pay for doing bad things. I'm just sayin' I can't generate much sympathy for him. You can always visit him in jail since you're his best friend.

I have known one person who served time in prison. He's a great guy, but he just knows he deserves what he got and it's over now. 

You should also give your bestie advice on how not to play games with women in the future. I don't mean to be a downer, but we women can be an evil lot. "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned"  , ya know.

[sak4kat]

Like my guy always says.  The truth will all come out in the wash.  There has to be a states attorney that will represent him.  It seems a bit over the top over some CD's.  Perhaps there is more to the story?  I've only a known a few people that were county jails for DUI/no license issues.  Other than bailing one guy out I didn't get involved legally with the other.  Pray - and hopefully your friend does too.  He may have to adjust to a temporary change in his life and look for new ways to get by when all is said and done.  Tis unfortunate.

[countrygirl12]

You play; you pay. He'll have to pay for doing bad things. I'm just sayin' I can't generate much sympathy for him. You can always visit him in jail since you're his best friend.

I have known one person who served time in prison. He's a great guy, but he just knows he deserves what he got and it's over now. 

You should also give your bestie advice on how not to play games with women in the future. I don't mean to be a downer, but we women can be an evil lot. "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned"  , ya know.

lol.  I agree with this.  I do think getting even by lying to make it look like he was a thief was a bit of a stretch though.  They should have both set up a date in a public place and he think only one will be there and then both of them show up and dumped him very loudly and publicly. lol.

I am trying to see this as how I would feel if I had been in someone's house and they let me borrow a couple of DVDs and then called the police and told them I stole them.  But if he is in jail for 30 days or more then there has to be more to the story.  You don't usually get jail time for petty theft unless you already have a lengthy rap sheet for stealing or are on probation.  And if that is the case I am not sure why any woman would want to date him to start with.