How would you respond to this

[sherryfan]

I sure agree, if we are American, we should love our country and people.  If they don't like it, they should back to their own country. America is a melting pot. If anyone come from different country to land of America, they should be supportive to this country

[countrygirl12]

Well, there could be several reason why such a person is in America:
- they could be sent to America to work at their country's embassy, a few years of required service before they can go back home
- they work for a company who is contracted to do an implementation in America and are required to reside here during the implementation phase
- they are visiting relatives who do live here (not permanent residents)
- they are going to school (university) due to some work/personal need, and plan to return to their country once they graduate
- they work for a global company and are assigned to work in the America's region

There are probably numerous other reasons why someone who "hates America" may be here.

In a situation like the above, one thing to understand is middle eastern culture is highly patriarchal.  I know the OP is female (as am I), so part of the reason this gentleman didn't speak could have been due to you being American, but I would wager a larger one was that you were an American woman.  If he's traditional, American women are highly offensive to them - due to us working (which is man's domain) and not being covered as traditional middle eastern women are.  If I assumed this was the case, I would address the American man with the gentleman and ask if I should either get a co-worker who was male or the manager to assist the gentleman, or see if the American man will act as a go-between to assist the middle eastern gentleman.

This is America there is no go between to please this man. Either he learn American custom or go back where he came from. When in America do as American's do. After all this is America and not his country from which this man choose to hold his beliefs. No American should have to oblige this man when he chose to be here.

Absolutely!  Thank you.  I actually do not know "why" he hates Americans.  That is just what his friend told me.  I know there are a couple from the same place that actually have said that "Americans are stupid" and so on.  I guess if he said that to me I would say "well good luck getting one of us stupid Americans to help you" and walk away.  lol

The sad reality is most of the people from other countries think Americans are stupid and do not like us.

[kapeh12]

Well, there could be several reason why such a person is in America:
- they could be sent to America to work at their country's embassy, a few years of required service before they can go back home
- they work for a company who is contracted to do an implementation in America and are required to reside here during the implementation phase
- they are visiting relatives who do live here (not permanent residents)
- they are going to school (university) due to some work/personal need, and plan to return to their country once they graduate
- they work for a global company and are assigned to work in the America's region

There are probably numerous other reasons why someone who "hates America" may be here.

In a situation like the above, one thing to understand is middle eastern culture is highly patriarchal.  I know the OP is female (as am I), so part of the reason this gentleman didn't speak could have been due to you being American, but I would wager a larger one was that you were an American woman.  If he's traditional, American women are highly offensive to them - due to us working (which is man's domain) and not being covered as traditional middle eastern women are.  If I assumed this was the case, I would address the American man with the gentleman and ask if I should either get a co-worker who was male or the manager to assist the gentleman, or see if the American man will act as a go-between to assist the middle eastern gentleman.

This is America there is no go between to please this man. Either he learn American custom or go back where he came from. When in America do as American's do. After all this is America and not his country from which this man choose to hold his beliefs. No American should have to oblige this man when he chose to be here.

Absolutely!  Thank you.  I actually do not know "why" he hates Americans.  That is just what his friend told me.  I know there are a couple from the same place that actually have said that "Americans are stupid" and so on.  I guess if he said that to me I would say "well good luck getting one of us stupid Americans to help you" and walk away.  lol

The sad reality is most of the people from other countries think Americans are stupid and do not like us.

Interesting "fun fact" - one of the reasons why Americans are so disliked is that "we" (general Americans) behave exactly as this man does when visiting other countries (except for the "hating" the other country part - in some cases).  "Americans" have the reputation that when they are vacationing or on work assignments in other countries, they expect the people there to treat them as if they were in America...

In France, but don't speak French - who cares, I'm American so speak English so I understand you.  In Spain, but don't speak Spanish - that's not my fault, I'm American, so cater to me.

It's sad, but true - and when the tables are turned as in this situation - "we" get defensive.  I'd call that the pot calling the kettle black (in a global perception way).  How people in other countries might perceive the situation is one "American" getting a taste of what they deal with from "us".

If anyone ever has the opportunity to travel to another country, try to remember this and make an effort to comply with the country you are in to help dispel this general sentiment that has lingered.

Another "fun fact" - America (United States of) does not have any official language.  English is the language of choice due to the majority of people who speak it, but there is nothing on the books stating it is the country's official language.  (As opposed to Canada which actually lists both French and English as official languages).  This is why there are issues in states with large populations of Spanish-speaking immigrants considering making their state officially bi-lingual or changing the state's official language to Spanish.

That being said - the information provided in the initial follow-up comment to my post contained additional information on the situation that was not present in the original scenario which would, taken into consideration, somewhat alter my response to the situation.  Even with that, being in a service role, one needs to either accommodate such individuals as it's your job, or locate a co-worker or manager to handle the situation for you.  Responding in a hostile manner would only hurt you as it makes your employer look bad, not the customer - regardless of how rude they are.  That's when it's a good time to get management involved to deal with such situations as you "smile politely" (or are just grinding your teeth) at the customer as you go get them.

[cathy37]

I agree with you.  If they don't like Americans or America, why come here.  I think that is very rude to go somewhere and not speak to you if you speak to them.

[Tresbn00]

I think that adaptation is a key point when going to any country and if you "hate" you should keep your hatred to yourself, try to better understand your hatred, or avoid the hatred...in this case going back to a geography in which your hatred can be diminished.  If you are representing your country in a foreign land then represent in a proper manner. Not acknowledging someone because they are female or American is not proper representation and reflects poorly on the foreignor as well as the country from which they have come from. I do not hate but would not consider going  to a country that does not respect my beliefs,  both sexes or my nationality. If I were forced, by my government, to do so I portray my country and myself in the most positive of manners and adapt to my geographic location until I could come home.

[bremer51]

Don't lose any sleep over this.  There are many rude and mean-spirited people lurking around in the world waiting to derail you. Yes, you'd like to kick his is a-- to the curb, but you have your job and want to keep it. 

[holmesch22]

not trying to loose sleep over the situation