i try so hard to keep my plants and flowers alive but they don't last very long if you have any thoughts let me know
Are you talking about indoor plants or outdoor?
If indoor plants, I don't have a lot of luck either. Mostly because my "step-cat" (she was my husband's before we married, and she disliked me after I became a permanent feature) eats them. My husband can't even get me flowers unless we put them on top of the fridge.
The only indoor plants I've had luck with are African Violets (put them in a self-watering violet pot and use African Violet potting soil, mixed with a little vermiculite and perlite to allow more drainage) and jade plants (use Cactus potting soil). Both like a fair amount of indirect light. Water each about once a week (soak the soil and let it dry to encourage root growth) - but don't ever get water on the violet's leaves.
As far as outdoor gardens go, I'm having luck with raised veggie gardens. Raised beds are no wider than 4' so you can reach all your plants without stepping on the soil. My 4x12' garden has a fence along the backside, so I divided it into three 4x4 sections with a compacted path between. Since you never step on the of the actual garden, the soil is looser and you can crowd your plants a little more closely.
My gardens turn out well mostly because the state agricultural college has a local extension center - i can go to free veggie gardening and composting seminars, or call for advice. Look for something similar where you live. The basic building blocks of gardening are:
1) Soil test, soil test, soil test! Never add fertilizer or other amendments until you know what your soil is deficient in - it's going to vary depending on what you want to plant. Your local college can probably help you find out where to send your samples for testing.
2) Water with either a continuous soaker hose, or a good drenching once or twice a week. If you just water a tiny bit every day, the roots will never dig deep and your plants will be less tolerant of dry conditions.
3) Actually measure the amount of time each day that your garden receives sun. It may be more or less than you think. For instance, I was sure a couple patches of my backyard got at least a half day of sun, but when I measured it I found it was closer to 4 hours. I had to change the type of grass seed I planted there.
4) Mulch in your plants after they get started to keep weeds out and moisture in. Many mulches will actually keep your soil cooler during high summer, allowing your plants to grow better. Other types of mulches (like black plastic mulching) warms up early spring soils to let you plant earlier in the growing season.