Shy or just rude

[debidoo]

My nephew has a new girlfriend has to be middle twenties at least - met her at Thanksgiving and then she came with him to my Christmas party.  My brother-in-law says she is "shy"  I think she is rude.  At her age if she is that shy then she needs to at least be polite enough to say "Thanks for inviting me" I like your house, at least hi or goodbye.  But not a peep I think that is totally rude.  What do you guys think?

[kaat1220]

Some people are shy no matter their age. It can be rather intimidating meeting family and friends.

Just because you do not think she SHOULD be shy doesn't mean much. Shy people tend to clam up in social situations.

I HATED meeting inlaws and friends. It was absolutely terrifying.

I would let it go.

 

[snuggleycutejc]

  u not thinking of the unfriend.

[camellia0]

Sounds like she didn't want to be there. But definitely rude.

[vickysue]

She could very well be  very shy, maybe unsure of herself, I doubt if she was rude.  In time  and one on one she will open up. Did you ask your nephew if she is shy around  him or was it a large party that could  intimidate her. I  was shy at one time. But I got over after a bit. Part of mine was  moving  from one school to another in Ohio. People that I was  a Mexican  from Mexico instead of New Mexico and treated me like dirt. Once we got back into N.M. I opened up and  was not as shy except around new people that I had not met or was unsure of.

[linsanna]

My nephew has a new girlfriend has to be middle twenties at least - met her at Thanksgiving and then she came with him to my Christmas party.  My brother-in-law says she is "shy"  I think she is rude.  At her age if she is that shy then she needs to at least be polite enough to say "Thanks for inviting me" I like your house, at least hi or goodbye.  But not a peep I think that is totally rude.  What do you guys think?

 It would have been polite for her to say hello and thank you for inviting her but we never know what someone is thinking or what they have been through in life. We can not control how someone acts we can only control how we respond to it.

[paints]

My nephew has a new girlfriend has to be middle twenties at least - met her at Thanksgiving and then she came with him to my Christmas party.  My brother-in-law says she is "shy"  I think she is rude.  At her age if she is that shy then she needs to at least be polite enough to say "Thanks for inviting me" I like your house, at least hi or goodbye.  But not a peep I think that is totally rude.  What do you guys think?

Could be either, but if your nephew says she's shy, I would give her the benefit of the doubt, and not think she was intentionally rude.
Life's too short to worry over it.

[countrygirl12]

My nephew has a new girlfriend has to be middle twenties at least - met her at Thanksgiving and then she came with him to my Christmas party.  My brother-in-law says she is "shy"  I think she is rude.  At her age if she is that shy then she needs to at least be polite enough to say "Thanks for inviting me" I like your house, at least hi or goodbye.  But not a peep I think that is totally rude.  What do you guys think?

I would think she could at least say hi or bye or if you have food say thank you if something if offered to her.  Not speaking the whole time she is there I guess I would say was rude.  Idk.

[countrygirl12]

She could very well be  very shy, maybe unsure of herself, I doubt if she was rude.  In time  and one on one she will open up. Did you ask your nephew if she is shy around  him or was it a large party that could  intimidate her. I  was shy at one time. But I got over after a bit. Part of mine was  moving  from one school to another in Ohio. People that I was  a Mexican  from Mexico instead of New Mexico and treated me like dirt. Once we got back into N.M. I opened up and  was not as shy except around new people that I had not met or was unsure of.

I don't agree with that.  I met a girl a couple years ago that came with a family member to Christmas.  I knew she would be there so I got her a gift. She opened it up and just kind of shrugged her shoulders and tossed it to the side.  She went in to another room with person she came with and would barely speak to anyone.  Someone defended her saying oh she is unsure of herself. No she was flippin rude!  I do not care how shy you are if somebody gives you a gift open your mouth and say THANK YOU.  Even if you do not like it.

[1imaginarygirl]

It's hard to say without seeing her body language too. You don't necessarily "grow out" of shyness. And it may be more than that. She could have social anxiety. I have it myself. A few years ago, I was invited to a party by a girl I went to high school with, even though we were never really friends. I'm never invited to anything, except through my husband. I told myself to suck it up and go. I did, and it was SO stressful. The girl was busy talking to everyone else, and I didn't know anyone there. I didn't talk to anyone the whole time and eventually slipped out without saying anything. Maybe I seemed rude from everyone else's perspective, but I was on the verge of a panic attack the entire time. I was proud of myself for getting up enough courage to go by myself, even it was a failure. Don't be too hasty to make judgments. It takes me a loooong time to feel comfortable around new people. I'm still uneasy around my husband's family, and we've been married almost 10 years!

[ghunter]

Maybe she is shy, you have to get to know her to really know for sure.

[king4cash]

She is definately rude, but this is how the new generation operate, they do not speak to each other, they only tweet.

[Mizzkizz7]

My nephew has a new girlfriend has to be middle twenties at least - met her at Thanksgiving and then she came with him to my Christmas party.  My brother-in-law says she is "shy"  I think she is rude.  At her age if she is that shy then she needs to at least be polite enough to say "Thanks for inviting me" I like your house, at least hi or goodbye.  But not a peep I think that is totally rude.  What do you guys think?

She was rude. Always thank the person whose home you are visiting. It's not hard at all.

[hawkeye3210]

It's not rude. It's ridiculous to expect someone to feel completely comfortable people for the first time.

[bshee58]

Yes, it is really, totally, rude and plain unforgivable. She thinks she doesn't have to acknowledge people, older than her. I would bring it up to your son, about her attitude.