Suggestions on how to handle a bully

[freedavis]

Sometimes you have to stand up to a bully and show him your not going back down.  I think its the best way to get respect.

[jwkelly]

Sometimes you have to stand up to a bully and show him your not going back down.  I think its the best way to get respect.

   Move to another area.

[dsosnowski06]

Record them, document everything and then go to HR and let them know you spoke to your immediate supervisor and nothing has been done. I did this years ago when someone in our department was using the wrong type of language to some of us girls.  The bad thing was there was zero tolerance for the language and they were let go.

[countrygirl12]

If the bully actually ever puts their hands on you and you feel threatened, then you can go directly to the police. I had to do that for a job before when HR wouldn't take my complaints seriously. The police got involved and it turned out this other employee had an extensive criminal record and was let go.

Neither have ever touched me.  If they do I will def take action.

[countrygirl12]

It sounds like you are working in a hostile work place environment...   knowing where you work only matters because it would expand your options.  If it is a big enough company to have an HR, that is the place to go.   If you are union then you'd go to your union rep.

Keep documentation of everything that is happening to you, & when you speak to your managers & they're reaction.

If your closest mangers don't fix your environment, then keep going higher up to the next in line.

Hostile working environment is not healthy, it could result in stress & anxiety & then you could go out on a sick leave (if you have that)... go out on a medical leave of absence due to stress could lead to a lawsuit by you against the company... it would be in your companies best interest to fix the problem.

It's your company's issue to stop the bullying & stop the hostile work environment.  Because really there is only so much you can do.  Your managers should be speaking to those individuals and giving them progressive discipline for creating a hostile work environment.

Document EVERYTHING.... that is key, for your own protection.

It is a huge company. The problem is I am a contracted employee. So the company I am currently stationed in I do not actually work for.  Kind of makes things more complicated. I have a few things written down. I should have kept a diary from the start of the position. Documenting probably would never do any good because "they" will be believed over me unless I have video or something.

[countrygirl12]

Definitely record them,file a complaint,hostile work environment  lawsuit,turn lemons into lemonade(they get fired and you get more money),watch your back though.Might want to take self defense classes and carry pepper spray .

lol. I don't need self defense classes.  If something gets physical I can defend myself. And you can't spray a co-worker with pepper spray in the office.  That would get me put in jail.

[countrygirl12]

I went through something similar last year. I'm 31, and this lady was in her 50s. All she wanted to do was talk down to me, and make me feel inferior to her. We had many arguments, and many times I went to my manager about it. Even my other co-worker had occasional spats with her. All I heard was "Ok, it will be documented". Well one day, she got up in my face, said some threatening words, and I decided I had had enough. I called my manager again, had my co-worker back me up on what had happened, and told him I felt threatened and in a hostile work environment. I told him I wanted HR involved, and he immediately got them involved. She got suspended for week. When she came back, nothing really changed, but she wound up getting herself fired over a bunch of other stuff. When in doubt, contact HR.

Glad things worked out for you.  I think eventually they will hang themselves.  People see what is going on but for some reason nothing is ever done. Everybody just looks the other way.

[countrygirl12]

Well, if you were a kid, I'd tell you to bully them right back.  There's no better bully repellent than a sock in the nose! But you can't go around punching co-workers, I suppose.  Still, I agree with a few other responses. Knowing the type of work you do (not necessarily the company name or details) or size of the company might help to generate helpful ideas and no reason to lash out at someone who asks you that.


I work in a very small office with no HR department or large hierarchy. How I would handle things here is very different from how I would go about it in a company with 30 employees, which is different from how I would go about it in a company with 500+ employees.  I work a desk job in an office with limited exposure to the general public, but larger exposure to individual clients. How I would handle things here is very different from how I would go about it in a workplace with a more manual labor atmosphere or in a service job in the public sector.


The actual type of bullying might also factor into how it could be handled as well.  But all that said, documentation is definitely key.  I would go so far as creating a chronological timeline of when/how it started and each incident of bullying, including your response (if any).

LOL no punching co-workers if frowned upon. But I like the way you think.

[countrygirl12]

I think you have been provided some good advice here, especially from "flyinmonkey." Also, remember that the more a bully thinks they are getting to you, the more they bully.  Of course, some things cannot be ignored. Quite frankly, it sounds like your supervisors need training on how to handle such a situation and you may have a grievance against them as they are contributing to the situation by NOT handling it.

However, this particular situation aside, I am not surprised that even adults do not behave like true adults sometimes but bullies instead.  They are probably parents of bullies.  Furthermore, have you read some of the comment responses lately after certain political and social articles?  People in this country are saying some of the most atrocious things to each other. Is just not a matter of disagreement, but nasty, vicious, classless bullying.  I really thought lived in a country with better people than I have been exposed to over the last 6 months or so.

You are correct.  I have done good lately at not speaking to either of them.  The one has butted in to a couple of my conversations and nobody acknowledged she had spoke. lol I acted like I didn't even hear anybody speak.

People want to know why kids bully so much? Because that is how they see their parents act. They see how you treat the cashiers in stores, in fast food, how you treat people in Walmart or out shopping.  How you talk to friends about other people.  They see this and THAT is how they are going to act.

[countrygirl12]

Being bullied when I was very young.  Another girl on the bus was bullying everyone on the bus, but when she tried to do the same to me, I looked her in the face and said just try hitting me or anything else I will knock you out the bus window. You have to face up to bullies or they will not stop.  You also have do the same with Adults.

Sometimes there is only so much you can do.  I have to have a job.

[jwkelly]

Nothing like bad stress and justifying inaction to make your life perfect.

[judylucas]

look for another job

[countrygirl12]

Sometimes you have to stand up to a bully and show him your not going back down.  I think its the best way to get respect.

   Move to another area.

lol yeah packing up and moving to another town is going to solve the issue.  There are idiots and bullies every where.

[countrygirl12]

look for another job

It is not that easy.  Got a feeling they are both fixing to get what's coming to them. lol

[linderlizzie]

Being bullied when I was very young.  Another girl on the bus was bullying everyone on the bus, but when she tried to do the same to me, I looked her in the face and said just try hitting me or anything else I will knock you out the bus window. You have to face up to bullies or they will not stop.  You also have do the same with Adults.

Oh, I love this answer. Let them know you're not afraid of them. Take some self-defense classes if you're not strong enough right now. If you know, and they think, you can knock their blocks off, they'll lose some of their power over you.