This topic is locked, no replies allowed. Inaccurate or out-of-date info may be present.

  • Print

Topic: should I be upset?  (Read 3053 times)

vg7405

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Gold Member
  • ********
  • Posts: 2226 (since 2013)
  • Thanked: 49x
Re: should I be upset?
« Reply #15 on: March 04, 2017, 10:35:06 pm »
Did you husband have any animosity with the relatives that failed to respond? If so, I do not necessarily condone it. Let sleeping dogs lie and honor your husband accordingly. Life is too short to hold grudges. I had to learn that the hard way. In any event, if there is no animosity, I do not think it would hurt to contact them to see why they have not responded in kind.

Jayce2013

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 720 (since 2015)
  • Thanked: 17x
Re: should I be upset?
« Reply #16 on: March 04, 2017, 11:05:16 pm »
Of course you are sensitive... but not TOO sensitive.. you are talking about your husband, so you are the only one who cares the most, obviously... you can ask people to do something for you... but life is hard, weird, full of things... and unfortunately it is very difficult nowadays to be able to count on people, even family members.

If they love you and know it is important to you, they should be doing it FOR YOU... but you can't be too upset with them....
At least, it shows you who really cares and who is just too busy with its own life...
Either you accept and move on.... or you cut them out of your life.... getting upset does not do anything to them, only to you... and what for?

You just learned a lesson...

PS: sorry about your hubby! Losses like that are really hard..

PGS28

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Gold Member
  • ********
  • Posts: 3341 (since 2012)
  • Thanked: 62x
Re: should I be upset?
« Reply #17 on: March 06, 2017, 06:27:11 am »
I'm sorry for your loss.  Try to subside the anger (which I feel is justified) with prayer and empathy.

Today's my husband's death anniversary & I've asked my family members to light a candle in memory of him. Out of 5 siblings 3 brothers & 2 sisters, only my sisters & mom responded & nothing from my brothers! I can excuse my eldest brother, he lives out of the country but the other 2 I'm pretty upset about their combined silence! Am I being too sensitive about this?

6265AT99

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Silver Member
  • *******
  • Posts: 1727 (since 2012)
  • Thanked: 84x
Re: should I be upset?
« Reply #18 on: March 06, 2017, 09:37:55 am »
I think maybe it's a lot more sensitive an area for you than it is for anyone else so, I would say your memories are what is important and just let it go at that.

hitch0403

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Gold Member
  • ********
  • Posts: 3882 (since 2012)
  • Thanked: 127x
Re: should I be upset?
« Reply #19 on: March 06, 2017, 01:35:22 pm »
I remember as a child when there was a death in our family you couldnt play the TV or radio for a month.The funeral services usually went 3 days.The widows dressed in black forever.

The bible says there is a time to mourn and weep.The examples above are ignorance.Many are even based on superstitions where those alive think the dead are watching them and they better remember their birthday,holidays etc or be haunted if you dont.

The bible says when you know the truthabout the dead it sets you free from all this BS.

Jehovah is a God of the living not the dead.Jesus taught there would be a resurrection of the righteous and the unrighteous.The hope of that can comfort many knowing someday they would see their loved ones again instead of thinking they are in hell or heavenly bliss.They go back to dust and are aware of nothing.

My dad died in1982.My mom died in 1992.I had a brother who died in 2003.I have never been back to any of their graves after we buried them.Did i love them all?Of course.Do i miss them?Of course.Do i love looking at pics or moving pics with sound of them?Of course.Do i think of them daily everyday?Of course.I can do all of that without being in front of their grave.They would not know i was there if i did.
« Last Edit: March 06, 2017, 01:55:11 pm by hitch0403 »

ancmetro

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Platinum Member
  • *********
  • Posts: 5805 (since 2007)
  • Thanked: 82x
Re: should I be upset?
« Reply #20 on: March 07, 2017, 01:25:06 am »

      This too must pass. Life goes on!

nannycoe1

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Platinum Member
  • *********
  • Posts: 4027 (since 2013)
  • Thanked: 103x
Re: should I be upset?
« Reply #21 on: March 07, 2017, 08:02:17 am »
sorry for your loss

fillfran82

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Silver Member
  • *******
  • Posts: 1284 (since 2012)
  • Thanked: 72x
Re: should I be upset?
« Reply #22 on: April 07, 2017, 11:45:54 pm »
Today's my husband's death anniversary & I've asked my family members to light a candle in memory of him. Out of 5 siblings 3 brothers & 2 sisters, only my sisters & mom responded & nothing from my brothers! I can excuse my eldest brother, he lives out of the country but the other 2 I'm pretty upset about their combined silence! Am I being too sensitive about this?

Hello! :D :)

I don't know if I can tell you you are being too sensitive or not because I don't know the full story and additionally you have the right to react the way you please. However I can understand your disappointment, your family are expected to be there for you always. Perhaps you should write a letter to each of them and keep it private. Tell them how they let you down and hurt you and if you feel comfortable enough have a family meeting of some sort and talk about it.
"Live like tomorrow isn't promise" <3 Earn Your Life<3 Frans Online Business INC and Francesca Etheart INC. My eyes are blue and are open to all the beautiful wonderful possibilities mmmmm ya. "Don't dream your life live your dream." Mmmmmm ya for I'm a beautiful Sweet Soul Angel.

gaylasue

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Platinum Member
  • *********
  • Posts: 5528 (since 2011)
  • Thanked: 153x
Re: should I be upset?
« Reply #23 on: April 10, 2017, 07:50:46 am »
They could have at least responded!
Have a wonderful day!

griserelizabeth

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 101 (since 2017)
  • Thanked: 3x
Re: should I be upset?
« Reply #24 on: April 10, 2017, 11:04:19 am »
I'm so sorry for you loss! I don't think you're being sensitive but I think they didn't respond because they didn't know how to reply to your request or could've been too busy to respond. I think you should reach out to your brothers and let them know how you felt about them not responding to you.

plennis

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Platinum Member
  • *********
  • Posts: 4294 (since 2012)
  • Thanked: 150x
Re: should I be upset?
« Reply #25 on: April 10, 2017, 02:36:22 pm »
Light your candles, even if they did not respond to lighting candles, you reminded then so they will think about him and you(which is probably more important than lighting the candles).  You commemorate the day however it helps you.  Don't be upset it is just a waste of time and energy.  Be happy and remember the good times.
 

autumnsparklemom

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Gold Member
  • ********
  • Posts: 2107 (since 2013)
  • Thanked: 54x
Re: should I be upset?
« Reply #26 on: April 12, 2017, 04:37:10 pm »
Absolutely not. I am so sorry for your loss. Prayers to you.
*Image Removed*

  • Print
 

Related Topics

  Subject / Started by Replies Last post
5 Replies
2727 Views
Last post January 22, 2009, 10:16:37 pm
by shalomabeth
28 Replies
3925 Views
Last post December 19, 2011, 08:11:25 am
by eman27
Upset!

Started by Jbenert in Off-Topic

2 Replies
873 Views
Last post February 12, 2012, 09:16:27 am
by mc1962
upset

Started by aggie49 in Off-Topic

1 Replies
818 Views
Last post August 05, 2013, 10:09:51 pm
by marciaenglish
upset

Started by aggie49 in Off-Topic

9 Replies
1385 Views
Last post October 28, 2013, 07:04:07 am
by denton2244