personal problems with adult kid

[moonangel]

my oldest is 26  she has four kids was trying to force her mom into watching her four kids everyday so her husband can sleep thru the day he works nites and she works days my wife is not able to watch them they range from 13 to 18 months and the 13 year old is not responsible.  so in retaliation the being told no she sent a text to us sying that she does not need us on her life any more, well this has been going on for one and a half months anyone else go thru this and how ded you resolve it if you did

[countrygirl12]

Wow.  Sounds like she needs to grow up.  Is the 13 year old not in school?  Or any of the others?  I don't know what to tell you.  If she sent that text it makes me wonder how often you told her no as a kid.  Sounds like she is use to stomping her foot and getting her way.

[melissajh44]

How incredibly childish of her to keep her mother's grandchildren away from her out of spite. Life is too short to do something like that. I agree with countrygirl12, it's like stomping her feet and pouting. Grow up!!

She needs to use a daycare service. She and her husband are both working, they can find a way to afford it like most people with 2 working parents must do. Cut corners if necessary. She probably doesn't want to sacrifice money she'd otherwise use for her own personal spending, but guess what? Children are the ultimate sacrifice and SHE chose to have them. They are her and her husband's responsibility.

The grandmother did her job raising a child/children already. Looking after FOUR kids, everyday, that young, is no easy task!

[minioncookies]

In my opinion once you have kids your life no longer exists.. Your life is now revolved around your kids lifes and the only one responsible for those kids are the parents.. Weather they have 2 jobs or 3 jobs or even 4 jobs.. You were the one who poped them out and had them and now it's your job to take care of them.. I despice people who have kids and make excuses like "oh i have to work" "oh i have no time" Bull you should have thought about that before you had the kids! Best way to put it is close you legs and don't have anymore! It's not your kids job to take care of the other kids and it's not your mother's job to take care of your kids.. It's your job and your spouce's job.. As to the upbringing and attitudes also the parent's job to teach them how to behave and how to appreciate people.. If i got a text message saying " you are no longer needed or wanted in our lives" I would reply back with.. Deal.. Everytime you want something remember what you said.. Everytime you need to go somewhere remember what you said.. I find that people who Give their kids everything they want and give in to temper tantrums are the ones that make their kids the way they are.. It's a sad reality on life.. Some parent's are just not meant to be parents.. That's just my opinion.. Harsh.. But honest =]

[Tresbn00]

I am quick to write people off and this situation sounds like one in which you are better off without the headache.  If they are writing you off it is a blessing in disguise.  I think that they need you more than you need them.  Life is too short to deal with people who use you to help them when they can't handle problems that they put themselves into. Family always seems to think that they are entitled to your undying servitude.  You are not anyone's slave and should not demean yourself to that level by catering to their whims. I never thought of using my family to watch my kids when I worked first and third shifts while my wife worked first shift. It was my responsibility and my kids turned out fine from witnessing me work hard and continue to give them more love than almost all of their friend's familys gave to their friends.

[msmoneybags48]

My daughter has three children and asked me, since I am her mother, to keep my grandson while she gets things together in Georgia.  That is nearing 2 years now.  True, I had to change my life around, but I wouldn't have traded it for anything in this world.  I did it because I have been a part of his life before he was born and his father's mother would not have taken him in.  Having my grandson around me has given me the experience of raising a boy, because I raised his mother.  I promised myself I would be a better mother for my daughter than my mother was for me.  I have had her back and I know she appreciates it.  My hubby and my grandson has a great relationship.  He was not a part of his children's lives as they were growing up, and he credits God with the relationship he has with my grandson.  When he is out of school in May, my daughter plans to get him finally.  It will take a lot out of me because I love that little boy to death, but he wants to be with his mother, and he knows I am just a call away.

I think it is a shame your daughter is being that spiteful because she doesn't want to take responsibility for her own children.  I hope it will resolve itself, but sometimes your child has to crawl before she can walk.  She needed that wake up call, and she will need you again in the future.  Good luck.

[moonangel]

thank you everyone for saying what we had both talked about our daughter did experience something really bad when she was  very young so we really did spoil her and now she does need our help our grandson 5 years old might have brain cancer....if he doesn't we are going to lay down some rules about respect and let her know that it is our choice whether or not we help her or not...etc.  I know asking for prayer is a touchy subject but he needs it but please pray for him and for the people who dont believe in prayer please send good thoughts in his direction