Children Are Quick

[cateyes1]

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TEACHER:    Why are you late?
STUDENT:    Class started before I got here.
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TEACHER:    Maria, go to the map and find  North America .
MARIA:        Here it  is.
TEACHER:   Correct.  Now class, who discovered  America ?
CLASS:         Maria.
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TEACHER:    John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN:          You told me to do it without using tables.
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TEACHER:  Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
GLENN:      K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'
TEACHER:  No, that's wrong
GLENN:      Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.   
(I Love this child)
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TEACHER:   Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD:     H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER:   What are you talking about?
DONALD:    Yesterday you said it's H to O.   
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TEACHER:   Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE:       Me!
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TEACHER:   Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN:          Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.   
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TEACHER:     Millie, give me a sentence starting with ' I. '
MILLIE:         I  is...
TEACHER:     No, Millie... Always say, 'I  am.'
MILLIE:         All right...  'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'       
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TEACHER:    George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it.  Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
LOUIS:           Because George still had  the axe in his hand...     
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TEACHER:    Now, Simon , tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON:        No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.   
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TEACHER:       Clyde , your  composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your   brother's... Did you copy his?
CLYDE   :         No, sir. It's the same dog.     
(I want to adopt this kid! )
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TEACHER:    Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer  interested?
HAROLD:     A teacher
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PASS  IT AROUND AND MAKE SOMEONE LAUGH...
           
LAUGHTER  IS THE SOUL'S MEDICINE..

[tbosworth1]

Thanks for the making me laugh this morning.  I really enjoyed them! 

[bremer51]

Hahaha.  Those are adorable. Thanks for sharing.

[Tresbn00]

Yes they are!  I am especially proud of my fourteen and sixteen year olds.  My sixteen year old was invited to DECA Nationals last week but declined in order to take a chance at going to state for tennis...as a sophomore! She is taking all AP classes which should save us nearly an entire first years tuition.  My son was testing at a twelfth grade level...in sixth grade...until this year. Middle school was a complete waste...we should have had him skip it (and he was bright enough to do it). He was tossed in a leftover group of students division and the teachers failed miserably.  I don't understand why we are fighting for the 'leave no child behind' bs when we can not even take care of our brightest.

[msmoneybags48]

Are they ever!!!  I had made a cake when my daughter was 8, frosted it and put it in the refrigerator.  I walked to the refrigerator an hour later to find a slice missing.  I asked her if she messed with the cake, and she told me she sliced it and gave it to her brother.  I went to him and asked him if she gave him some cake, and he told me she asked him if he wanted some cake.  He told her yes, so she sliced it and gave it to him.  It was her way of using him to get some cake too.  What tickled me to this day is that she took a slice out of the cake and it was perfect.

She is now 27 with three children of her own.  Her son uses the same method on me when he wants something.
 

[lguzman1]

Well you must be a teacher to come up with all of this, thanks you made me laugh and yes I copied all of. I really enjoyed it! 

[ghunter]

yes, they are, so you have to keep your eyes on them at all times