MISSISSIPPI DECLARES WAR ON U.S. GOVERNMENT

[cateyes1]

 








President Barack Obama was in the Oval Office when his telephone rang."Hello, President Obama" a heavily accented southern voice said. "This is Jimmy Boy, down here at Bump's Catfish Shack, inVicksburg , and I am callin' to tell ya'll that we are officially declaring war on y'all!"
 
"Well Jimmy Boy," Barack replied, "This is indeed important news! How big is your army?"
 
"Right now," said Jimmy Boy, after a moments calculation "there is myself, my cousin Tom, my next-door-neighbor and brother Gerald, and the whole dart team from JD's Bait Shop. That makes eight or maybe nine depending if Bump can close the store.
 
Barack paused. "I must tell you Jimmy Boy that I have one million men in my army waiting to move on my command."
 
"Wow," said Jimmy Boy. "I'll have to call ya back!"
 Sure enough, the next day, Jimmy Boy called again. "Mr. Obama, the war is still on! We have managed to acquire some infantry equipment!"
 
"And what equipment would that be Jimmy Boy?" Barack asked.
 
"Well sir, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and my brother Mike's farm tractor."
 
President Obama sighed. "I must tell you Jimmy Boy, that I have 16,000 tanks and 14,000 armored personnel carriers. Also I've increased my army to one and a half million since we last spoke."
 
"Lord above", said Jimmy Boy, "I'll be getting back to ya."
 
Sure enough, Jimmy Boy called again the next day. "President Obama! I am sorry to have to tell you that we have had to call off this here war."
 
"I'm sorry to hear that" said Barack. "Why the sudden change of heart?"

Well, sir," said Jimmy Boy, "we've all sat ourselves down and had a long chat over sweet tea, catfish, greens and pie and come to realize that there's just no way we can feed that many prisoners."
 
SOUTHERN CONFIDENCE CANNOT BE SHAKEN
 
If you are a REAL Southerner, you won't even need to be told to pass this on!
 
Baby diapers and politicians should be changed often and usually for the same reasons.
 


 

[6265AT99]

President Barack Obama was in the Oval Office when his telephone rang."Hello, President Obama" a heavily accented southern voice said. "This is Jimmy Boy, down here at Bump's Catfish Shack, inVicksburg , and I am callin' to tell ya'll that we are officially declaring war on y'all!"
 
"Well Jimmy Boy," Barack replied, "This is indeed important news! How big is your army?"
 
"Right now," said Jimmy Boy, after a moments calculation "there is myself, my cousin Tom, my next-door-neighbor and brother Gerald, and the whole dart team from JD's Bait Shop. That makes eight or maybe nine depending if Bump can close the store.
 
Barack paused. "I must tell you Jimmy Boy that I have one million men in my army waiting to move on my command."
 
"Wow," said Jimmy Boy. "I'll have to call ya back!"
 Sure enough, the next day, Jimmy Boy called again. "Mr. Obama, the war is still on! We have managed to acquire some infantry equipment!"
 
"And what equipment would that be Jimmy Boy?" Barack asked.
 
"Well sir, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and my brother Mike's farm tractor."
 
President Obama sighed. "I must tell you Jimmy Boy, that I have 16,000 tanks and 14,000 armored personnel carriers. Also I've increased my army to one and a half million since we last spoke."
 
"Lord above", said Jimmy Boy, "I'll be getting back to ya."
 
Sure enough, Jimmy Boy called again the next day. "President Obama! I am sorry to have to tell you that we have had to call off this here war."
 
"I'm sorry to hear that" said Barack. "Why the sudden change of heart?"

Well, sir," said Jimmy Boy, "we've all sat ourselves down and had a long chat over sweet tea, catfish, greens and pie and come to realize that there's just no way we can feed that many prisoners."
 
SOUTHERN CONFIDENCE CANNOT BE SHAKEN
 
If you are a REAL Southerner, you won't even need to be told to pass this on!
 
Baby diapers and politicians should be changed often and usually for the same reasons.
 


 

Love this cause it's absolutely true!!!!!

[nhendrickson]

Yeah, I can see that they would come to that conclusion after a huge meal of fried everything.  Isn't Mississippi one of the leading states in obesity?

[patti4me]

I love it!!  Wish I knew how to keep it so I could pass it on!  Can anyone tell me in layman's terms how to do that?

[batmobile]

President Barack Obama was in the Oval Office when his telephone rang."Hello, President Obama" a heavily accented southern voice said. "This is Jimmy Boy, down here at Bump's Catfish Shack, inVicksburg , and I am callin' to tell ya'll that we are officially declaring war on y'all!"
 
"Well Jimmy Boy," Barack replied, "This is indeed important news! How big is your army?"
 
"Right now," said Jimmy Boy, after a moments calculation "there is myself, my cousin Tom, my next-door-neighbor and brother Gerald, and the whole dart team from JD's Bait Shop. That makes eight or maybe nine depending if Bump can close the store.
 
Barack paused. "I must tell you Jimmy Boy that I have one million men in my army waiting to move on my command."
 
"Wow," said Jimmy Boy. "I'll have to call ya back!"
 Sure enough, the next day, Jimmy Boy called again. "Mr. Obama, the war is still on! We have managed to acquire some infantry equipment!"
 
"And what equipment would that be Jimmy Boy?" Barack asked.
 
"Well sir, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and my brother Mike's farm tractor."
 
President Obama sighed. "I must tell you Jimmy Boy, that I have 16,000 tanks and 14,000 armored personnel carriers. Also I've increased my army to one and a half million since we last spoke."
 
"Lord above", said Jimmy Boy, "I'll be getting back to ya."
 
Sure enough, Jimmy Boy called again the next day. "President Obama! I am sorry to have to tell you that we have had to call off this here war."
 
"I'm sorry to hear that" said Barack. "Why the sudden change of heart?"

Well, sir," said Jimmy Boy, "we've all sat ourselves down and had a long chat over sweet tea, catfish, greens and pie and come to realize that there's just no way we can feed that many prisoners."
 
SOUTHERN CONFIDENCE CANNOT BE SHAKEN
 
If you are a REAL Southerner, you won't even need to be told to pass this on!
 
Baby diapers and politicians should be changed often and usually for the same reasons.
 


 

Love this cause it's absolutely true!!!!!

This is really dumb! the north won get over it...and there is nothing you can do about the government sorry

[sigmapi1501]

Yeah, I can see that they would come to that conclusion after a huge meal of fried everything.  Isn't Mississippi one of the leading states in obesity?

Also the dumbest state. But that's only if you go by education statistics and literacy rates. You know, that learnin stuff

[BlackSheepNY]

EEEEE GADS, folks, it's a joke!  Why would you "Northern Obama supporters" insult your Southern brothers and sisters over a JOKE?  I dunno, sounds awful RACIST to me! 

[vp44]

Racism still exist, take a look folks. Guess what the joke is on you. Remember the words We Shall Overcome. Take a look at Forbes or Black Enterprise. Your words only show that your the only ones living in the past. Wake up it is a new Horizon, hahaha. The cat have left the building cause that there person tried to cook me and commit pet murder. Dang this new year have brought me new jokes and new frame of mind. Love It!

[handllucas]

Too funny.
Admitting defeat/backing down while saving face.

[momoney555]

Mississippi has come a long way from the days of lynching and firehose and attack dogs on innocent people.  If this is true and they still feel this way in Mississippi,  I am just glad they no longer have the power they did in the "Good Ole Days" to do anything about it and this mentality will just hopefully die out or just fade away as America goes on to become a good place for all its people.

[Nancy5]

Think the whole think is plain stupid.  There is no "north" vs. "south", last I looked we are all Americans, the war is long over, the north won, give it a rest!

[freshtees]

With all due respect, most of those people don't understand government nor politics. It is just because of preset agendas and dislike of The President who WAS ELECTED BY US! The President has had to and will be compromising a whole lot because of the Republican Congress blocking everything he tries to do even if they do actually agree with it.
It's time for elected officials ON BOTH SIDES to grow up, and do what they were elected to do! (SERVE the people and do what is BEST for our country!)

[pac4lyfe]

I was born and raised in the South and I'm not the least bit amused by this "joke".

[healthfreedom]

This is very funny, but it definitely gets a point across. We've seen our country slowly move away from a republic to a despotic ruling goverment.