~* Humorous and Funny Quotes *~

[LenoraMinogue]

These are hilarious. Thank you so much for your contributions. I needed the laugh.

[lutznellie]

Do or do not, there is no try. – Yoda

[jfoulkes42]

A good laugh helps the soul be happy 

[jkhanson]

He taught me housekeeping; when I divorce I keep the house.
Zsa Zsa Gabor

good one.


I also like George Carlin's ."It isn’t fair: the caterpillar does all the work, and the butterfly gets all the glory."

[jcribb16]

"Advice is like castor oil, easy to give, but dreadful to take."
~ Josh Billings ~



"I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places."
~ Henny Youngman ~

[stretch1967]

Yeah everyone needs a good laugh thank you.

[jcribb16]

He taught me housekeeping; when I divorce I keep the house.
Zsa Zsa Gabor

good one.


I also like George Carlin's ."It isn’t fair: the caterpillar does all the work, and the butterfly gets all the glory."

Ha ha!  Me, too! 

[jcribb16]

"To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first. And, whatever you hit, call it the target."
~ Ashleigh Brilliant ~

"Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry."
~ Bill Cosby ~


I hope everyone is having a great start to the new week! 

[DeliriousKris]

We all have that one as friend who always give the best relationship advice but is still single.

[jcribb16]

"Thank you Facebook, I can now farm without going outside, cook without being in my kitchen, feed fish I don’t have & waste an entire day without having a life."
~ Unknown ~

"The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept."
~ George Carlin ~

"In the primary school, I was an outstanding student. My teacher would send me to stand outside of the class as a punishment."
~ Unknown ~

[stretch1967]

Thank you all for the good laughs

[jcribb16]

"Money Talks … but all mine ever says is Goodbye!"
~ Unknown ~


"Nothing is so embarrassing as watching someone do something that you said couldn’t be done."
~ Sam Ewing ~


"We didn’t lose the game, we just ran out of time."
~ Vince Lombardi ~

[jcribb16]

"I feel like I’m diagonally parked in a parallel universe."
~ Unknown ~

"It’s frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions."
~ Anonymous ~


"There are three types of people in this world: those who make things happen, those who watch things happen and those who wonder what happened."
~ Unknown ~


I hope everyone is enjoying their weekend!  Remember to take time to pamper yourself with something you enjoy, no matter how small it is!!!

[remediagirl]

If you teach your children nothing else, teach them the Golden Rule and "righty-tighty, lefty-loosey."  ~Robert Brault

[jcribb16]

"An original idea? That can’t be too hard. The library must be full of them."
~~ Stephen Fry ~~


"Why go to college? There’s Google."
~~ Unknown ~~


"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays."
~~ Henry Youngman ~~

Hope everyone is enjoying their Sunday!  Have a great new week, too!