Overweight... your thoughts.

[sgluckadoo]

I know research shows that society favors attractive people, but i am curious how overweight people perceive themselves. I have been thin and overweight. My weight has bounced around a lot. I think less of myself when I am heavier and lose respect for myself.

[froggylover227]

First of all, NEVER lose respect for yourself because of your weight. Weight is something that be taken care of, it's not something that you can't change! I myself have went from being thin to being heavy. I'm not obese, but I'm not at what the doctor thinks is my average weight. Personally, I did feel sexier when I was skinny. But this drove me to constantly striving to be sexy. I had to wear make-up, I had to eat "healthy", I had to impress people. Then I gained a few pounds. I started dating a guy who would later turn out to be my husband. And he didn't care about my weight. He didn't care if I wore make-up or not. He loved me for who I was. And now I don't feel so pressured to be somebody I am not. I don't really care for the whole make-up thing. You are lucky if you can get me to even wear a dress! But I like who I am, and that's all that matters. The whole world is so obsessed with the stick-thin image, but back in the day, like from the 20s to the 40s, rounder, plumper women were the sexy ones! Besides, as my husband says, there's just more of me to love then! Love who you are and never be ashamed of it! 

[champak97]

Being overweight is not a problem as long as you are healthy, active, and eat healthy food.

[awette26]

i think being overweight is not a bad think at all. i myself have been 40 pounds overweight my whole life. but i really do feel good with my weight i just wanna lose a bit because of people and to fit in clothes very easily. other than that i think the main think is to be healthy and to work out at least 30 mn a day. once you accept yourself people will accept you for who you are

[demaina]

First, I would like to point out that there is a difference from being overweight and being unhealthy.  I'm sure if we took a wrestler with some of those massive muscles and weighted them we'd find out that they weight more than they should, and it's not because they are fat.  I'm sure that's not what you meant, but that's one thing that's sorta bugged me how weighing more than you should deems people as unhealthy when really it doesn't mean anything by itself.

I have been overweight all my life.  When I was a kid my doctor would freak out cause I was off the chart for weight for my age.  Of course being off the chart in height for my age didn't seem to factor into that though.  Right now I'm borderline 5'10 so I've been told I'm suppose to weight 150 lbs.  I hit 180 lbs for a while and thought I looked good.  To go to 150 though I'd probably have to lose all the fat and muscle on my body, and I don't think I'd look good then.

That's one thing many need to understand is that you will not be attractive to EVERYONE.  You may fit societies definition of sexy to a T but I'm sure there is someone out there that won't find it attractive.  So, you're better off finding the shape that you find attractive (and that's healthy) and sticking with that, cause you will find someone that agrees with you.  Or, if nothing else, someone might be attracted to you cause you are a confident person with your own definition of sexy.

I also agree with froggylover227 comment about how attractiveness changes.  We're pretty much fighting an uphill battle with trying to be thin when we should try to be healthy.  Someone could be a rail and still think they should be thinner.  They might not be overweight, but it's still not healthy.

I have a friend who has lost probably 30 lbs since I met her and she looks good.  Every time I hang out with her now some 40+ guy will come up to us and offer to buy us drinks.  I'm sorry but if this is what I'm gonna have to deal with when I get back to my desired weight, I'd rather be overweight and ignored then the girl guys think will sleep with them if bought a few drinks.

I may joke about how I'd be the person people would pay to keep my clothes on, but I'm okay with how I look.  If I lost weight I'd be happy, since I've gained about 20 lbs throughout my college years, but I'd also be fine if I stayed this way as well.  What you really need to do is take a step back and figure out why you think less of yourself.    Generally it's something someone said to you or because of an image you find attractive yet don't match.

I always look at it like this.  Ever see that one guy that really doesn't fit the attractive definition but still thinks he's attractive.  Or the Progressive commercial with Sonic and the guy who thinks he looks like the strongest man in the world.  Strive to be more like him.  Look in the mirror and see all the good things about yourself instead of the so-called "flaws."  Wear what you feel sexy in instead of what you're told you should wear to feel sexy.  Just be you cause you are the best you out there.

[sherryinutah]

There's a fine line between learning to love and accept yourself...as you are...while you might still take steps toward self improvement.  It's a personal choice and it's always important to project self love and self respect. 

[jenniferhoder]

I think you just have to be happy with yourself. If you can be happy if you are overweight, great- but just be happy with yourself!!

[Skyisbluetoday]

Overweight has nothing to do with how you feel about yourself! You can have more weight and be happy! 

[sgluckadoo]

First, I would like to point out that there is a difference from being overweight and being unhealthy.  I'm sure if we took a wrestler with some of those massive muscles and weighted them we'd find out that they weight more than they should, and it's not because they are fat.  I'm sure that's not what you meant, but that's one thing that's sorta bugged me how weighing more than you should deems people as unhealthy when really it doesn't mean anything by itself.

I have been overweight all my life.  When I was a kid my doctor would freak out cause I was off the chart for weight for my age.  Of course being off the chart in height for my age didn't seem to factor into that though.  Right now I'm borderline 5'10 so I've been told I'm suppose to weight 150 lbs.  I hit 180 lbs for a while and thought I looked good.  To go to 150 though I'd probably have to lose all the fat and muscle on my body, and I don't think I'd look good then.

That's one thing many need to understand is that you will not be attractive to EVERYONE.  You may fit societies definition of sexy to a T but I'm sure there is someone out there that won't find it attractive.  So, you're better off finding the shape that you find attractive (and that's healthy) and sticking with that, cause you will find someone that agrees with you.  Or, if nothing else, someone might be attracted to you cause you are a confident person with your own definition of sexy.

I also agree with froggylover227 comment about how attractiveness changes.  We're pretty much fighting an uphill battle with trying to be thin when we should try to be healthy.  Someone could be a rail and still think they should be thinner.  They might not be overweight, but it's still not healthy.

I have a friend who has lost probably 30 lbs since I met her and she looks good.  Every time I hang out with her now some 40+ guy will come up to us and offer to buy us drinks.  I'm sorry but if this is what I'm gonna have to deal with when I get back to my desired weight, I'd rather be overweight and ignored then the girl guys think will sleep with them if bought a few drinks.

I may joke about how I'd be the person people would pay to keep my clothes on, but I'm okay with how I look.  If I lost weight I'd be happy, since I've gained about 20 lbs throughout my college years, but I'd also be fine if I stayed this way as well.  What you really need to do is take a step back and figure out why you think less of yourself.    Generally it's something someone said to you or because of an image you find attractive yet don't match.

I always look at it like this.  Ever see that one guy that really doesn't fit the attractive definition but still thinks he's attractive.  Or the Progressive commercial with Sonic and the guy who thinks he looks like the strongest man in the world.  Strive to be more like him.  Look in the mirror and see all the good things about yourself instead of the so-called "flaws."  Wear what you feel sexy in instead of what you're told you should wear to feel sexy.  Just be you cause you are the best you out there.

You are so right! I am almost 5"11 and was once 175 and looked emeciated! It was awful. I look my best between 185-200. I am very big boned (for real- my dad is 6"6 and huge, but not fat). So assigning a number to me just doesnt work. People used to make fun of me for being almost 200 pounds, but when they saw me at 175 they thought i was starving!

My problem is how I feel about myself I guess. I am actually obese by definition and know that I am not healthy and woule benefit from weight loss, but dont feel motivated bc I feel so poorly about myself. Weird huh?

[sgluckadoo]

First of all, NEVER lose respect for yourself because of your weight. Weight is something that be taken care of, it's not something that you can't change! I myself have went from being thin to being heavy. I'm not obese, but I'm not at what the doctor thinks is my average weight. Personally, I did feel sexier when I was skinny. But this drove me to constantly striving to be sexy. I had to wear make-up, I had to eat "healthy", I had to impress people. Then I gained a few pounds. I started dating a guy who would later turn out to be my husband. And he didn't care about my weight. He didn't care if I wore make-up or not. He loved me for who I was. And now I don't feel so pressured to be somebody I am not. I don't really care for the whole make-up thing. You are lucky if you can get me to even wear a dress! But I like who I am, and that's all that matters. The whole world is so obsessed with the stick-thin image, but back in the day, like from the 20s to the 40s, rounder, plumper women were the sexy ones! Besides, as my husband says, there's just more of me to love then! Love who you are and never be ashamed of it! 

Thanks for the feedback!

[squirrelgirl44]

When I was overweight, I never really cared. I liked to eat, I liked to drink beer. It didn't bother me. Then, it sorta started to bother me. So I exercised and dieted and lost weight. 8 years later, I will still say I have a distorted body image. I am 112 lbs and 5'0" but I still feel "chubby." I dunno, it's just an American thing I think.

[Adroden2010]

my weight goes up and down like a yoyo....i ty to keep my weight under 160.....i have more energy when im 30 lbs lighter but i look sick to other people and myself.....but it doesnt bother me that much....i like my curves....

[sigmapi1501]

Being overweight is not a problem as long as you are healthy, active, and eat healthy food.

Ummm... Uh.  Ha. Uh... Well, how exactly will one be over weight doing these things? 

[ghunter]

I hate being overweight, and I wish I was skinny and not overweight, but I am trying to loose some of this weight and I plan on walking to help.

[DeliriousKris]

Unfortunately, society has made even healthy people seem "overweight" if they're not stick thin.

I've been overweight before (as a result of eating terribly all the time) and I've started taking back my health.
It needs to be an issue of wanting to be HEALTHY...not being SKINNY.
You can be skinny, and be unhealthy.

If you strive to be fit, then you're going to feel good about yourself.

And if you slip up, don't get down on yourself and hate yourself or lose respect for yourself. Slipping up every so often and not eating healthy foods, or eating more than you should isn't anything to be ashamed of...you just have to keep it in check.
Even if you are trying and find you can't keep yourself in check...there are people out there that will help you.
But the first step if that you have to love yourself, regardless of your weight and appearance.
If you lose weight just to be skinny...you'll never be satisfied. Love your body as is. Compliment yourself and find things you love about yourself RIGHT NOW, and then work on what you think are your weaker areas...but never forget that there is NOTHING wrong with you RIGHT NOW.