What do you think of adults who are shy?

[swkstudent]

I happen to be one of them. I have been shy or introverted since I was teenager. Now people usually treat me like I'm much younger because of my shyness or they mistake me for being stuck up. What do you think of adults who are shy?

[arogacki13]

i dont think people should treat you differently just because your shy... people are different in plenty of ways.. so what lol you are who you are

[swkstudent]

That's true, but people don't all think like you. Some are not as open minded. I guess the people I tend to be around are more extroverted some are very outgoing and they just don't understand why I'm shy or quiet.

[loulizlee]

I feel your pain!!  I was painfully shy most of my life (I'm now 68 years old).  The CEO of a business I used to work for once told me I was the shyest person he had ever known.  Actually, I was extemely shy around him because I thought he was intimidating.  I was much less shy with my supervisor who I worked with daily.  I had always wanted to go to college, so when I was in my early 60's I started night school.  Most of the classes required an oral presentation at least once a week.  At first they weere excruciating, but they became easier.  Now I don't have nearly as much trouble voicing my opinion or getting in up front of a group of people.  If you can, I advise a course in public speaking.  It may be difficult at first, but you will see a big difference in your being able to connect with other people.  Good luck.

[swkstudent]

I feel your pain!!  I was painfully shy most of my life (I'm now 68 years old).  The CEO of a business I used to work for once told me I was the shyest person he had ever known.  Actually, I was extemely shy around him because I thought he was intimidating.  I was much less shy with my supervisor who I worked with daily.  I had always wanted to go to college, so when I was in my early 60's I started night school.  Most of the classes required an oral presentation at least once a week.  At first they weere excruciating, but they became easier.  Now I don't have nearly as much trouble voicing my opinion or getting in up front of a group of people.  If you can, I advise a course in public speaking.  It may be difficult at first, but you will see a big difference in your being able to connect with other people.  Good luck.

Well I'm actually in school now and I'm a social work major so I do like people, I just get intimidated or nervous around them. I hate giving presentations but I do them and they only last about 5 minutes. I know that I'm going to have to work on my shyness to succeed in my career. People can be kind of harsh though. Well some not all, a lot of people are understanding as well.

[loulizlee]

I understand what you are saying.  After being so painfully shy when I was in school that I would go home crying sometimes because no one would play or talk to me, I learned later that many people thought I was stuck up, too.  As I got older, I would try to take the initiative and  talk to people - perhaps in the grocery store - and I learned that most people will respond, if only with just a 'hello'. 

[candygyrl79]

I don't think I've ever been shy a day of my life. I was raised that only God can judge me, and that really stuck with me through oral presentations. I've learned that if you don't have confidence in yourself, then who will?

[discardedheart]

I can also relate. I've always been extremely backwards in social situations. I've never been good with meeting people OR speaking in front of groups. You have to sometimes make yourself do things that are uncomfortable - but knowing the relief you'll feel when it's over is SO helpful! That's how I got through many, maaany oral presentations in high school. Get up there and get it over with as soon as possible. And when it's finished, it's finished! The weight is lifted from your shoulders
People are just people and they have inner feelings and worries too, always remind yourself of that, they're just like you. And if you're doing a presentation for school, keep in mind that the people watching will have to get up and do the exact same thing.

[yosav]

i think its a good trait

[AdamH1978]

I am not shy, but my wife is introverted/shy.  I had to try really hard to get to know her when we first met, but it was worth the effort.   She is not shy around me since the first days we knew each other 6 years ago and she has opened up in general towards everyone else since we have been together.  She will never be as extroverted as myself, but that is fine.   

[masked_brown_guy]

just consider yourself lucky some people can not afford to be shy.

[dreamyxo]

I am shy but I am less shy as I have gotten older but still pretty shy.  I have no problem speaking in front of a group of people or giving presentations but with social gatherings where you have to mingle I don't.  I have a harder time just speaking with people one on one or small groups depending on the situation.  If it's someone I feel comfortable with I have no problem conversating with them just depends on whether or not I feel some sort of connection with the person.  I click more with some people than others.

[davidf938]

I wish more were. I hate having strangers approach me as if I were their best friend.

[Annella]

Being shy and not normally comfortable around social situations are two different things. If someone has no problem speaking in front of people, then you are not shy. My advice to someone who is painfully shy and want to change that should join Toastmasters. This will help you communicate with people and force you to speak in front of people without being judged. It's also a lot of fun besides. You will meet people like yourself and it will help you get comfortable around people. Be prepared to laugh and have a blast.

[swkstudent]

Being shy and not normally comfortable around social situations are two different things. If someone has no problem speaking in front of people, then you are not shy. My advice to someone who is painfully shy and want to change that should join Toastmasters. This will help you communicate with people and force you to speak in front of people without being judged. It's also a lot of fun besides. You will meet people like yourself and it will help you get comfortable around people. Be prepared to laugh and have a blast.

Wow I never heard of toastmasters. I wouldn't call myself painfully shy but when I give presentations (which is often) it's obvious that I am nervous. I will look into the toastmasters. Thank you.