How do you stop from stressing out so much??????

[cateyes1]

I have 2 grown children, My daughter is 33 and my son is 29. I thought that when they were grown and made a life of their own the worries would end there. My daughter and her husband just bought a new house and I worry (was this a mistake) my son just moved in with someone he's known for awhile yet i'm worring should they have taken it to that level and NOT move in right away? anyone that has grown children do you still worry about them? should I just let life take it's course and what ever happenes happenes and dont stress over it because it's out of my control anyways?..how does 1 stop stressing over every little thing? HELP i'm losing my mind with this stress ...thanks peeps HUGS to you all...........

[BizELady]

I have 2 grown children, My daughter is 33 and my son is 29. I thought that when they were grown and made a life of their own the worries would end there. My daughter and her husband just bought a new house and I worry (was this a mistake) my son just moved in with someone he's known for awhile yet i'm worring should they have taken it to that level and NOT move in right away? anyone that has grown children do you still worry about them? should I just let life take it's course and what ever happenes happenes and dont stress over it because it's out of my control anyways?..how does 1 stop stressing over every little thing? HELP i'm losing my mind with this stress ...thanks peeps HUGS to you all...........

Pray and Leave it in God's hands.

[cateyes1]

I have 2 grown children, My daughter is 33 and my son is 29. I thought that when they were grown and made a life of their own the worries would end there. My daughter and her husband just bought a new house and I worry (was this a mistake) my son just moved in with someone he's known for awhile yet i'm worring should they have taken it to that level and NOT move in right away? anyone that has grown children do you still worry about them? should I just let life take it's course and what ever happenes happenes and dont stress over it because it's out of my control anyways?..how does 1 stop stressing over every little thing? HELP i'm losing my mind with this stress ...thanks peeps HUGS to you all...........

Pray and Leave it in God's hands.

Thank you, oh I pray ALL THE TIME...and most times God listens 

[Anasatsia]

Meditation, go for a walk, coffee, (it's scientifically proven that caffine helps women relax), watch movies, go outside, listen to your fav music, if your worried about them, don't think about what could go wrong, but all the things that could go right.  Stay positive.  If all that does not work, go to a spa and ask for your fav service, like aromatheropy massage, (that's my fav) if that does not work, then you need to go to your doc and get some anti-anxiety pills.  It can't fail.

[noirlupe]

I went through this issue a few years ago.  My daughter was with a man that was in and out of jail but I knew if I said anything to her I would not see her or my two grandkids again, so I let her make her choices so she could learn from her own mistakes and now she is with a very good man and very happy and I am happy for her.  Its hard to stay out of their lives and yes I still worry, but they need to learn their way on their own and as a Mom you just sit back and let them and are there with the tissues and the shoulder to cry on.  I have 5 kids and its very hard some times to sit back but we are all happier for it in our relationship with each other.

[kapeh12]

One thing I've learned is that worrying accomplishes nothing other than sapping the energy out of the person doing the worrying.  Worry doesn't change outcomes, or solve issues.  Therefore I decided long ago never to "worry" about things for any duration of time simply because it does no benefit to anyone.

Instead, I take the advice of the serenity prayer ("God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.").  By trusting in this, you can reduce your stress in worrying by telling yourself that worrying is not doing any good, so you are going to stop.  Acknowledge you do have concerns regarding your children's decisions.  And depending on your relationship with your children, perhaps look for an opportunity to voice your concerns to give them a chance to present their side.  You know your children and if they are prone to good or bad decisions - if good, then give them the benefit of the doubt that they thought things through.  And if they didn't and their choices wind up going south, knowing you are there to support them will mean more than them knowing you worry (as worry translates to distrust often).

If you do decide to talk with them about their decisions, I would suggest starting by congratulating them on their decision, then lightly voice your concern - posing it more of a question that you wanted to make sure they "thought things through", then sit back and let them tell you how they came to their decision.  Most likely, neither of their decisions were made on a whim, and they both put some varying degrees of thought/planning into them.  And maybe when you hear that, their explanations will help sooth your concerns/fears.

Good luck!

[torch71]

One thing I've learned is that worrying accomplishes nothing other than sapping the energy out of the person doing the worrying.  Worry doesn't change outcomes, or solve issues.  Therefore I decided long ago never to "worry" about things for any duration of time simply because it does no benefit to anyone.

Instead, I take the advice of the serenity prayer ("God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.").  By trusting in this, you can reduce your stress in worrying by telling yourself that worrying is not doing any good, so you are going to stop.  Acknowledge you do have concerns regarding your children's decisions.  And depending on your relationship with your children, perhaps look for an opportunity to voice your concerns to give them a chance to present their side.  You know your children and if they are prone to good or bad decisions - if good, then give them the benefit of the doubt that they thought things through.  And if they didn't and their choices wind up going south, knowing you are there to support them will mean more than them knowing you worry (as worry translates to distrust often).

If you do decide to talk with them about their decisions, I would suggest starting by congratulating them on their decision, then lightly voice your concern - posing it more of a question that you wanted to make sure they "thought things through", then sit back and let them tell you how they came to their decision.  Most likely, neither of their decisions were made on a whim, and they both put some varying degrees of thought/planning into them.  And maybe when you hear that, their explanations will help sooth your concerns/fears.

Good luck!

Solid advice!  Thanks for sharing thoughts.

[cateyes1]

One thing I've learned is that worrying accomplishes nothing other than sapping the energy out of the person doing the worrying.  Worry doesn't change outcomes, or solve issues.  Therefore I decided long ago never to "worry" about things for any duration of time simply because it does no benefit to anyone.

Instead, I take the advice of the serenity prayer ("God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.").  By trusting in this, you can reduce your stress in worrying by telling yourself that worrying is not doing any good, so you are going to stop.  Acknowledge you do have concerns regarding your children's decisions.  And depending on your relationship with your children, perhaps look for an opportunity to voice your concerns to give them a chance to present their side.  You know your children and if they are prone to good or bad decisions - if good, then give them the benefit of the doubt that they thought things through.  And if they didn't and their choices wind up going south, knowing you are there to support them will mean more than them knowing you worry (as worry translates to distrust often).

If you do decide to talk with them about their decisions, I would suggest starting by congratulating them on their decision, then lightly voice your concern - posing it more of a question that you wanted to make sure they "thought things through", then sit back and let them tell you how they came to their decision.  Most likely, neither of their decisions were made on a whim, and they both put some varying degrees of thought/planning into them.  And maybe when you hear that, their explanations will help sooth your concerns/fears.

Good luck!

From someone whos been there so can relate...your advice is much appreciated and I love the serenity prayer...I will do just that...big hugs to you and thanks soooo much!!

[cateyes1]

I went through this issue a few years ago.  My daughter was with a man that was in and out of jail but I knew if I said anything to her I would not see her or my two grandkids again, so I let her make her choices so she could learn from her own mistakes and now she is with a very good man and very happy and I am happy for her.  Its hard to stay out of their lives and yes I still worry, but they need to learn their way on their own and as a Mom you just sit back and let them and are there with the tissues and the shoulder to cry on.  I have 5 kids and its very hard some times to sit back but we are all happier for it in our relationship with each other.

Hun i'm so glad your daughter is with a good man now...thank you for your advice. my kids always know I will be there for them 

[Tresbn00]

Take a deep breathe and assess what the worst that could happen is...and examine what the likelihood that the worst will happen.  Determine if you ahve prepared your son in the best ppossible manner.  I have, hopefully, instilled the best of moral and ethical values in my children (ages 12 and 14) as well as started them in the right educational direction...I trust that they will make the right choices when faced with tough scenarios...and am not terribly stressd at the prospect that they won't.

[mynevaeh]

This is a good question and I wish I had an answer for that but frankly I am overly stressed myself.  I am a single mother of a 3 year toddler.  Out of work due to: fibromyalgia, PTS, MDD, anxiety, ceizure related migraines, and restless legs syndrome, plus I just had arthroscopic surgery to my right shoulder due to downsloping, bursitis and a torn labrum.

I have much to stress over seeing that I am overwhelmed that I am 28 years old and feel like I am 60.  Things have gone from bad to worse in the blink of an eye after having worked so hard to reach my goals.  I was just where I wanted to be and it all just slipped away through my fingers.  I applied for SSDI (Social Security Disability Insurance) in hopes that I am approved so that I can atleast afford to try Accupuncture since my insurance doesn't cover it.  My plan is try accupuncture to hopefully feel some relief to get off of my medications as they are no longer effective and I am past the maximum dosage.  Hopefully a more natural approach will help as I am on 11 pills a day and they just keep increasing.  I just want to go back to work as soon as my health permits ~ so I just keep praying! 

[Frank08NJ]

Pray and get a MASSAGE!!!!!

[sbmackie]

I don't have grown kids, I am actually a new mom and a college student, so stress is always high. I like to read, crochet, walk, or even play wii. I do know this parents will always worry about their babies. My parents always worry and I live 10 minutes from my grandpa.

[cloudsoup]

crafting always helps me relieve stress.
if i'm making something, i'm usually totally focused
and concentrating on it (i can be a perfectionist though,
and sometimes making things can even lead to stress
for me!) but i do it for fun and because i love it, so
i try to put my perfectionism aside and just do it.

i've also found that a good long nap is what i need
to de-stress, and maybe some ice cream when i wake
up  its the little things, they say...

[AMBER6446]

What helps me from stressing out so much is that I keep a happy song in my head..