Should you do a room check often in your child's (children) room?

[doctorike]

 I have been questioned by several of my friends who don't believe I should monitor and do room checks in my children's room. What do you think?

[jorhea]

How old are your kids? I always checked (muliple times!!!) when they were little and then when they became teens looked in before going to bed myself.

[Stealth3si]

Are there doors closed or opened?

[hawkeye3210]

It really depends on the age of your kids.

[CHANEYLAKEGIRL]

When you say room check, are you just peeking in to see that they are ok & sleeping or are you going through their rooms? My children are adults (in college) and I usually peek in before I go to bed and say goodnight if they are awake. I think I often checking if they were sleeping before I went to bed as they were growing up. I never did go through any of the thing in their room.

[mskelle]

Definitely!  I don't feel parents are keeping in tune with their children enough these days.

[oonamas]

When you say room checks I get the feeling you're snooping through their room. I'm sure in some situations this is probably warranted, but now that I'm an adult I've found out my mom used to go through my things (not a ton, but a little) to make sure nothing bad was happening, and it still makes me uncomfortable! Can't a kid get some privacy? I've always been very independent, so I guess it just bothers me a little. I understand the intention, but unless there's something you're actually looking for - like you smell alcohol on your kid and go looking for booze as proof - I don't know why a parent would feel the need to snoop!

If you treat your kid like an inmate, they're going to go wild after they're sprung free...

[charmaine56]

 

the way the world is today. if you did not do a room check you would not be a good parent. people can put drugs in your childrens favorite snack. a play gun might be a real gun. even a b b gun can be laced with poison. you have to search for drugs and guns. then birth control in that instance you want to talk about it and not go accusing anything. theres something to be said about a normal parent and a snooping. are you looking to judge and punish or are you looking to be a supportive person in your childs life. parents need to learn to be supportive caring nurturing and helpful to a a child. otherwise they will go the way of the wayward peers.

 

[cheeseland321]

Im only 14 years old and i dont think you should check on children's room unless ur kids are in elementary school. We dont feel comfortable when out parents goes into your room and start going through everything. Its invasion of privacy. Only do it if your REALLY protective or unless they're in elementary school.

[ULuvCeCe]

I think if you have reason to believe then yes but if you're just doing it to be a snoop then no. And to be honest with the crowd, my mom was being a snoop and she found a letter I wrote her asking if my dad was really my father etc etc. Well we learned 2 things that day, my mom was violating my personal space and he wasn't my real father!

[doctorike]

We are talking about children ages 0-19. Should age matter?

[Annella]

My son's room was his own private space. The only time I went in was to check on him before going to bed myself, or to tell him to clean up his room. I gave him his independence.....even encouraged it. There was nothing that my son could not tell me, or ask my help. To go snoop in his room when he was not there would be invading his privacy and trust.

[LilyLilac]

Do you mean peeking in to see if they are asleep? or going through their stuff?

I think that's wrong and a invasion of privacy and TRUST.

[lywb2168]

It depends on what you mean, I have 2 teenage girls, one rule in my house is that no door gets locked, I mean bathroom and bedrooms doors, unless is mine and that depends on the reason why I would do it.    I give them independence up to a point.  I go to their bedrooms to make sure the room is clean, to talk to them or yell at them depending on the situation, to say good night and to make sure they are doing homework.  I go in and out all day during the weekends for laundry and to make sure they cleaned, I do not snoop on their stuff but then they know I would do it if the situation arises, they have no problem with that.  When they work and pay rent then they can have all the privacy they want for now it is my house and my rooms I look thru anything if I think that there is something I should know and they do not tell me, same with their emails and facebook accounts, I will check them if I smell something fishy otherwise they can have their provacy all they want.

[oonamas]

I'm a little confused about why a parent wouldn't let their teenage daughter lock the bathroom door!? I also don't think it's terribly realistic to worry about BB guns and snack packs being laced with poison. I'd love to know how many times you have found that your kids squirt gun is actually a real gun, or discovered poison in your kids snacks or BB's.