Divorce?

[TVALLO]

So ok I have three women in my life two family members and one co worker.  All three are divorced or in the process.  My Aunt started seeing someone immediately after, My cousin really just has some mental issues I think something traumatic happened when she was little and it messed her up, and my co worker is already seeing someone else and the divorce isn't even processed yet.  So seriously what is up with that.  Family members frustrated me, we all believe divorce is wrong from a moral stand point, but they have done it anyway which confuses me greatly.  My co worker is just unfaithful, she told me this the other day that her husband is upset that she is seeing another man....I was like No kidding.  She acts like she is the victim.  I know I dont know what happens at home but I know her pretty well to know that she has been cheating for a while and its all her idea for the divorce.  So venting done, what is everyone elses opinion on divorce since the rate is so high now a days. 

[rcadams1980]

Don't get me wrong, I believe that once you marry someone, you should be faithful and do everything you can to keep that marriage strong.  However, when it gets to the point where you are miserable and there is nothing you can do to make it better, you should definitely throw in the towel.  Life is too short to be miserable.  I speak from experience.

[sigmapi1501]

Why is divorce so expensive?

Because it's worth it!

[dreamyxo]

Maybe the divorce rate is so high because humans weren't meant to mate for life with one person.  Sure there are people who do it but I think that's the exception rather than the rule.  I'm a child of divorce.  I have family members now who are in the process of divorcing.  I have other family members who should be divorced but aren't and they are just making each others lives miserable for what?

I'm not married but if I ever get married I wouldn't get married to get divorced but stuff happens.  People change.  If it's not working why stay and be miserable?

[jusu]

I'm divorced...it took me 24 years to find the courage to do it. I tried for all of those years to hang on to something that was horrible and abusive. My Sister was so mad at ME for doing it...she wasn't the one living my life and she had no right to judge me. Two years now and she still won't talk to me. I was always faithful, but cheated on. I was always walking on egg shells. Sometimes you reach a point and there is no turning back.

[karenkpc]

been there done that.
I do see divorce as "if an all else fails" kind of event, rather than an immediate escape.  I believe in working hard to make things work...it also takes two to accomplish that process successfully. 

[rightontargt4]

In my opinion, if a marriage is meant to work out, it doesn't take any work to keep the relationship strong. If people want to cheat, clearly they're not still into the marriage, and they want something new. It's still a problem, but they shouldn't fight to stay married, because they were obviously blind when considering marriage in the first place if they weren't totally happy.

[wischmeyersn]

My mom and Dad just recently went through a divorce. In my opinion, it was probably the best thing they ever did. They were married for 24 years, but for as long as I can remember they were having problems. They just weren't happy, now after the divorce they are both happier then I have ever seen them. So I guess in my opinion sometimes divorce isn't such a bad thing.

[MorbidRaccoon]

Being a child of parents who fight all of the time, divorce might not always seem like a bad option compared to the alternative, at least on my end. 

[stokeman455]

  Yeh, my parents were married 25 years before they divorced and both re-married too!  I`ve been divorced 2x and it is a   Blessing in discise for me anyway

[inluvwitmm]

People don't get married to get divorced, it just happens. More so now because it's become so accepted. My parents are divorced and I'm glad! It needed to happen...they weren't in love anymore, they were doing things to each other because there was hate between them. Unfortunately, people grow apart and most people don't know how to communicate well enough with their spouse to make things work.

About the cheating and dating before the divorce is finalized...some people know the marriage is over but don't get out of the marriage before moving on. It's part of the failed communication. It sucks, but it's reality. We can all say how we'd do it if we were in that situation, but you don't know how you'd act until you're actually in the position and faced with those issues.

[kenrachel1993]

the only reason for divorce is if your being abused mentally or physicaly

[cubarican210]

I'm married and I intend to stay that way. I date my husband for 4 years before we got married. You definitely have to get to know the person very well before you decide to make a committment with that person. Seriously, picking out a date or a life partner is like picking out your favorite sweater. You got to make sure you're never going to get tired of that person. I'm against divorce. My parents got divorced when I was 15 and I made it my mission that what happened with them is not going to happen with me and my husband. It is said that you learn from your own mistakes but for me I learned from my parents mistakes and I made sure not to do the same things that they had done. The very things that led them to get divorced. Basically you just got to do your homework. All I can say is that you let them be. Don't let them influence your decisions in life. You know you hate divorce so when you get married make sure you find the right one before you say "I do" Trust me you'll know it in your heart when it is the right one. Something will definitely click into place when you see that person walk in the room. It's kind of sad but my parents divorce happened for a reason. Had they not gotten divorced I would've never met my husband. And that's because my dad moved to Florida and my mom took me and my other siblings to live in Puerto Rico. It's a shame that out of someone elses disgrace someone else gets a happy ending. In this case it was my parents divorce and my marriage. It's crazy but that's how life is.

[GoGoKokiGo]

I don't see it as wrong at all. If someone feels it needs to be done then it needs to be done. Why stay where you are unhappy? And if it's the other person that feels unhappy, why force them to stay with you so you're happy but make them miserable in the process? And don't even get me started on if one of them is cheating.

[mscrys]

Marriage to me is a beautiful union, God ordained. It was never intended for the two to divorce, but for the hardening of man/woman heart, (that is strife, envy, jealousy, any form of abuse) He said, give them the decree in writing. I believe in staying together and working at it, but it does take two. If you see that you can't then pursue.  Isn't it better, to live your life free of fear, death, stress to the point of being hospitalized, low self esteem, just a more profitable way of life in generally. Remember this is so true: no matter how hard you work at it, if the individual doesn't want to change you can't make them. So do what is going to be beneficial to you. I have been there and done that. to God be the glory, I'm still alive. I still believe in marriage. It's not the marriage that lets you down it's the individual.