Are people who are Childfree selfish?

[jordandog]

Thanks, queen.

I just thought of one supremely selfish parent, the infamous Octomom aka Nadya Suleman. You need 4 daughters and 10 sons you are totally incapable of taking care of, who are also predisposed to behavioural and genetic problems, simply because you don't want all those frozen eggs going to waste. Hmm, now that makes sense to me!

[klkwid]

Thanks, queen.

I just thought of one supremely selfish parent, the infamous Octomom aka Nadya Suleman. You need 4 daughters and 10 sons you are totally incapable of taking care of, who are also predisposed to behavioural and genetic problems, simply because you don't want all those frozen eggs going to waste. Hmm, now that makes sense to me!

OMG-this Octomom just makes me soooo mad!  What a selfish waste of space she is!  I still can't believe a doctor allowed this to happen-what ever happened to that doctor, anyway?  Did he have any kind of punishment for acting unethically?

[tiffkk09]

I love my son , and would LOVE to have a second child sometime in the near future, but due to medical reasons i dont think that will be happening, i couldnt see life without my son; My cousin just had a baby and gaver him up for adoption, and already wants another.... now i believe having children continuously and givin them up is partially selfish

[shernajwine]

I love my son , and would LOVE to have a second child sometime in the near future, but due to medical reasons i dont think that will be happening, i couldnt see life without my son; My cousin just had a baby and gaver him up for adoption, and already wants another.... now i believe having children continuously and givin them up is partially selfish

that is just ridiculous! i have heard a comment made that sounds silly but i think it has merit....there should be a screening process that will approve or disapprove people for having children. it takes away some rights but sheesh this example here is just plain irresponsible!! why the hell do people go out and get pregnant if they don't want a baby? in this day and age i would be hard pressed to find a truly ignorant person (teens) included that doesn't understand the concept of contraception! here in my city they even pass out free condoms at Planned Parenthood. they don't ask questions you just walk in and ask for some and they give it to you! now i don't promote promiscuous behavior but if you're gonna do it at least don't be stupid for crying out loud!

sometimes it happens (like with me) regardless of your measures for taking precaution but i said....you know what, i got pregnant and there is a little life that is depending on me to make good decisions, so regardless of whether i planned it or wanted it i have a responsibility!

people make me so mad  sometimes

sorry i ranted there a lil bit 

[tiffkk09]

I love my son , and would LOVE to have a second child sometime in the near future, but due to medical reasons i dont think that will be happening, i couldnt see life without my son; My cousin just had a baby and gaver him up for adoption, and already wants another.... now i believe having children continuously and givin them up is partially selfish

that is just ridiculous! i have heard a comment made that sounds silly but i think it has merit....there should be a screening process that will approve or disapprove people for having children. it takes away some rights but sheesh this example here is just plain irresponsible!! why the hell do people go out and get pregnant if they don't want a baby? in this day and age i would be hard pressed to find a truly ignorant person (teens) included that doesn't understand the concept of contraception! here in my city they even pass out free condoms at Planned Parenthood. they don't ask questions you just walk in and ask for some and they give it to you! now i don't promote promiscuous behavior but if you're gonna do it at least don't be stupid for crying out loud!

sometimes it happens (like with me) regardless of your measures for taking precaution but i said....you know what, i got pregnant and there is a little life that is depending on me to make good decisions, so regardless of whether i planned it or wanted it i have a responsibility!

people make me so mad  sometimes

sorry i ranted there a lil bit 

Yes i told her she shouldnt be having more children quite yet shes only 17 got prego with her son at 16, and is sleepin with i dono who to have another one....

[queenofnines]

why the hell do people go out and get pregnant if they don't want a baby?

Yep!  It is really not THAT hard to not get pregnant, people!!!  Stupidity and carelessness in most cases, I tell ya.   

[tantricia44]

I am all for animal "children", Sheryl!    They're a ton less expensive, you don't have to worry about raising them wrong or teaching them profound life lessons, they're a lot easier to take care of, they only live to be 15 or 20, they love you unconditionally, and the best part is, THEY DON'T TALK BACK!  lol  

I don't want to experience death and the pain so why would my kid?

Also you would be putting your kid into a potentially troublesome economy where they might have to struggle just to survive when they're older...

What if they grow up to kill or molest little children or rape females. All things that happen but it not certain.

Yep.  Even if you were the perfect parent, all bets are off when the rugrat is living on his own.  lol

I don't understand why people want kids or feel the need. I try to stay away from as much difficulty and pain in life as I can.

I can sort of understand; it is one of the most quick-fix ways to feel like you're doing something "meaningful" with your life (no offense to parents and p.s., thanks mom!  ).  But the cons far outweigh the pros in my opinion.

Yes, they do talk back. Shadow cat talks back just like any 2 legged child would do to defy his parents. Oh well, at lease I don't have to scrap to send shadow to college. lol

[tantricia44]

One needs to look past the fun bits of babies and their kids saying something cute and remember that raising kids is a tremendous, tiring responsibility!

So true, queenofnines. I knew I wanted children and I also knew it was a huge, and lifelong, undertaking. Mine might all be out of the house now, but my responsibilities to them has not ended, it has simply changed. I have mentioned before that after almost 14 years of marriage, my husband decided HE had had enough and disappeared, literally - it took me 3+ years to track him down and he never did wind up supporting them or me in any way, shape, or form. He was smart enough to go to a state that had no reciprocity with the state we lived in and he knew damn well I had neither the time, resources, or tons of money to go where HE was, hire an attorney there, and spend who knows how much time fighting him in court. I had 3 sons to take care of and was also working 50-60 hours a week in a hospital - with absolutely NO help from my family. I was the proverbial 'Black Sheep' for having tainted the family name by divorcing - wicked, wicked woman am I!  I am beyond thankful for my small circle of people I consider my best friends because without THEIR help, I would have been riddled with guilt for times I couldn't be and do everything - like when I was on-call and had to take off in the middle of the night. I knew I could pick up the phone and any one of them would be at the house in minutes, no questions asked.

There were many days I was beyond exhausted, but I was the one who signed up for motherhood and all that went with it. We ate dinners together as much as possible, I never missed a parent-teacher conference, baseball/sports game of any kind, awards ceremonies, they ate healthy, and above all knew they were loved and appreciated - should say appreciated other than holes in plaster walls, broken windows, etc. when attempts to 'kill each other' failed. I am not saying I was superwoman and I was far from perfect, but they all turned out to be pretty wonderful 'pieces' of this society and world we live in.

I have heard more parents (than I could possibly put a number on) say,"What was I thinking when I wanted to get pregnant/had kids?!" On the flipside, I can probably count on one hand how many childless I have heard say, "What was I thinking when I didn't want kids?" Not ONE of my close friends have ever said that, but they do joke that they are 'surrogates' for helping me with mine when they were young. I apologize for running on so long here - day off and way too much coffee.

Jordondog I solute you. I don't think I could deal with rising children after the father left. Though by law, the father need to take responsibility to those children. If he can't help raising them in person, he should be doing it behind bars!

[Angelbot]

I dont believe that anyone who decides NOT to have kids are selfish! i think more power to you if you choose not to have them! just means that they are making a choice to not bring a child into a home where either the lifestyle/busy work schedules would mean the child would be left alone or with someone else most of the time, or they chose not to bring a child into the world due to the economy or are not able to have them. Ive known many people who chose not to have kids and are the most wonderful people in the world.. they just dont feel they are worthy of having them or just plainly chose not to have them at all.

[houdiniphile]

We women need to have control of how many children we ahve. GREAT TOPIC, by the way. Ask any 5 year old girl .or 15 even. She will tell you how many kids she wants. 0, 2, 6, thepoint is she already knows. NOW, think about how many she will actually have? We need to make a world where those two numbers line up, where only the desired number is the number we have,

[Sweetpea94]

I don't think that childfree people or couples are selfish I think that alot more people now days are more goal oriented and sometimes having a family doesn't fit in to the picture.  I think also with the way the economy is and all the problems in the world people are deciding not to bring children into the world to avoid putting them through all these problems.  Sometimes childfree people (couples) are childfree because of medical problems.  But no I don't think they are selfish.

[BizELady]

If a person knows they are not parent material or they don't have the means to support a child, they are not being selfish.  They are making a conscience decision.

[animikokala]

People who are childfree are not selfish, since it's a matter of personal choice, not a requirement to live.  There's really nothing more to be said.