Family Frustrations

[demaina]

I wish people would realize that when you open up to them, not to sorta beat you into the ground with it.

Last night I had a big freak out in the middle of the night about never being able to find a job because I'm so far behind on everything and the 12 articles I just read basically support that fact and just tons of things building up on themselves to create this impassible wall that just overloaded my brain.  And, I'm already tired and stressed out about everything so it's hard to remind yourself that you can get past it.

Well, I mentioned it to my mom in passing, explaining why I'm not really tired right now, and she asked what I was talking about, so I start explaining how I was worried I'd never find a job and before I can finish the sentence, she's already interrupting with, "just picture the job you want and work towards it."  So I try to go back and explain why it was hard to see that when all I wanted to do was sleep and before I get far into it she's saying "just picture..." all again, so I say I already know that and start trying to explain why again before getting cut off with "well then do it already."

It's like, for crying out loud, I'm trying to explain something to you that kept me up all night and all you can do is attack me.  Is there any wonder why I have impostors syndrome with helpful people like you in my life beating me down?  It's like, I already worked through it, so obviously I don't need you telling me how to fix it, so why are you telling me to fix it?

I explained how during one interview they asked what I know about Javascript and I had to use it for one program in one class, so I said "we used it in a class but never got far into it".  After thinking about it, it's probably not the best way to phrase it, but I went to that job fair to talk to about a job in advertising and design, so I wasn't planning to talk about Javascript, so I didn't plan anything ahead of time in case it came up.  Well, again, she decided to lecture me about how you need to talk yourself up when you're applying for a job (which I hate/suck at doing) and be confident even if you don't think you are a good candidate for the job (which I don't know how to be confident when you can't answer their first question).

It's just so frustrating cause now I'm upset again and all I wanted to do was explain why I couldn't fall asleep until like 8AM.  I don't get those people who are probably trying to help but don't seem to get that the person didn't ask for help in the first place.

[potluck6]

don't know your work experience maybe to young to have any.stores are hiring for xmas help temporary probably but any work experience looks good on applications. Also it can be who you know more then what you know so if a friend or relative has a job ask if they are hiring. You may have to take a second choice instead of what you want. It is good you are trying my sons friend has almost given up .Best to you.Your mom seems to be trying to help i'm looking on here and elsewhere for my son seems to be more jobs out there now again good luck.

[Ronnis25]

Family members just want to help because they care.  We tend to forget the best thing we can do to help is lend a listening ear.  Praying for you to find a job.  I know you still love your mom.    God Bless

[gaylasue]

I know what you mean about not being able to get your brain to shut down at night.  I use to work a job that was very profitable but extremely stressful.  I was having to take medication at night just to get my brain to shut down so I could get a little bit of sleep.  It made me feel real groggy the next day.  I never thought it would be a blessing to lose that good paying job but the Lord knew (and knows) what is best for me.  I guess it's another blessing that my health improved dramatically after that job since I no longer have the health benefits or extra money for doctors and medicines!

[Timberlan127]

I can understand your frustration but in the case of your mom I'm sure she only wants you to succeed and is afraid for you. So she tries to say things that she thinks will give you courage to go on and doesn't realize that it's not what you need to hear right now. I hope things come around for you. It's so frustrating to work hard toward a goal and not be able to get there.