When you don't like someone

[debidoo]

How do you make yourself like someone when you just don't no matter how you try.  I don't like my youngest son's girlfriend or her nine year old daughter.  I know that sounds awful but the daughter has apparently never been taught how to act and her mother never says anything to her.  If she does say something to her it is just to threaten to take her phone away and she doesn't follow through with anything.  We all went out to eat for the first time and the daughter acted like a wild animal in the restaurant.  God I wish they would break up.  I let them stay in our new house because of the hurricane and I didn't think I was ever going to get them to leave so I can see what she has in mind.  Lord help me on this one please.

[michele2042]

That's a tough one.  I just have no idea what I would do in that situation.   The only thing I can imagine doing is trying to talk to my son about the daughter's behavior but I would also be nervous he would get upset with me and cut off contact.  I hope someone here has some useful advice for you.

[sak4kat]

What I say I would do and what I actually would do are completely different things.  I can't imagine being in that situation. So many things I cast judgement on (which is totally wrong) just from what you mention in that brief statement.  9 year old with a phone ugh! Mom probably thinks her daughter is the next best thing since the creation of the sun. I would avoid public outings with them.  How embarrassing!

[hitch0403]

Too many takers in this world...and they expect it....especially when they get a FREE taste.

Speak to your son calmly and dont be a meal ticket.Always be kind...but firm too and just for yourself and them.

[linderlizzie]

How do you make yourself like someone when you just don't no matter how you try.  I don't like my youngest son's girlfriend or her nine year old daughter.  I know that sounds awful but the daughter has apparently never been taught how to act and her mother never says anything to her.  If she does say something to her it is just to threaten to take her phone away and she doesn't follow through with anything.  We all went out to eat for the first time and the daughter acted like a wild animal in the restaurant.  God I wish they would break up.  I let them stay in our new house because of the hurricane and I didn't think I was ever going to get them to leave so I can see what she has in mind. Lord help me on this one please.

You asked the right guy. He's the only one who can help you. Sometimes he's the only one who can.

[Shalyn323]

I think a lot of kids are just running wild these days. The parents don't discipline them and they don't have to work for anything. There are 10 yr old walking around malls in hordes playing on cell phones and swearing! Its a disgrace to our country.

[sfreeman8]

Since I don't know your son, i can only tell you what happened in my case. ...I didn't care for one of my son's girlfriends and when he asked what I thought, I told him the truth...but also told him it wasn't for me to decide his future with this person, just to be careful.

Sooner or later, if the girlfriend is everything you say, hopefully your son will wake up and realize what kind of person this girlfriend is for himself.and that will be the end of the relationship. It might take a few years (like it did with my son) but as long as there's no marriage, there's a chance he is waking up.

[countrygirl12]

How do you make yourself like someone when you just don't no matter how you try.  I don't like my youngest son's girlfriend or her nine year old daughter.  I know that sounds awful but the daughter has apparently never been taught how to act and her mother never says anything to her.  If she does say something to her it is just to threaten to take her phone away and she doesn't follow through with anything.  We all went out to eat for the first time and the daughter acted like a wild animal in the restaurant.  God I wish they would break up.  I let them stay in our new house because of the hurricane and I didn't think I was ever going to get them to leave so I can see what she has in mind.  Lord help me on this one please.

You cannot make yourself like someone.  Learn to tolerate them I guess.  Does your son not see an issue with how the kid acts?  If they move in together or get married this kid is going to be a big part of his life.  I can't stand kids who don't act right.  And NO it is not just being kids.  Sounds like she needs her B---tt busted.  And if she keeps at it do like these other parents have done and smash her phone.

[davissy]

Yikes, a nine years old should be old enough to understand how to behave in a restaurant.  Was your son fine with this?  Maybe since they're staying in your home you can lay down some rules?  Like no phones at meal time, everyone has to do chores, etc.

[hkckk5]

Good luck with that one. My son had dated some girls I did not care for but I tolerated them. Then he married one I really hoped he would not and she kind of grew on me. Some people change with age. Hopefully things will get better for you.

[camellia0]

The only thing that I can say is to be nice to them because you don't want your son to have to choose. and if he loves her, then he may push you out the picture. Just be around them as less as possible.