What would you do?

[articx]

What would you do if your son wanted his fingernails painted pink?


 
What would you do if your daughter wanted to do something considered to be a boy thing?

 

[jake20vt]

I think it would depend on their age. Luckily I do not have children yet, but that is a very good question.

[Penwoir]

I think I would ask my son why he wanted to paint his nails pink. I don't mind his answer is but I would want to understand why he wants what he is asking for. Perhaps if a son has many sisters and no brothers, I could totally understand him lacking a bit of identity. But either way, it wouldn't bother me.

[moonangel]

you didn't mention his age but mine was about fourteen when hi wanted to go goth this was something he really wanted to do it didn't hurt anyone he was drinking doing drugs he was a pretty good son he stayed out of trouble  and it wasnot something his dad and I wanted him to do  but we did and now that he is a adult his is a very good son and husband and father  and he even thanked us one day for allowing him to do that and he is not goth now so I say talk to your child  and decide for your self it could just be a "stage " he is going thru

[msmoneybags48]

I would accept it.  My sister didn't want to, but she had to accept the fact that my niece was gay.  She has been coming out of the closet for a while now. My stepdad said he knew because, instead of panties, she likes to wear men's briefs.  I thank God every day that my daughter is not like that.

[Timberlan127]

The daughter wanting to do " boy things" is easy; I would tell her she can do anything she wants. The son painting his nails pink is a little harder because there could be a lot of repercussions with his peers. I think I would talk to him about that aspect of what he wants to do.

[maxinmotion]

That is a very good question. I would have to consider the age and if my soon wanted to paint his nails pink he better have a good reason. If he is feeling gay or having some kind of personal issues we would just have to work through it, but I would have to ask him to hold off on the pink nail polish.

Same thing for my daughter, if she have a good reason and understanding of what it is she's trying to do. Hopefully she will know if the choice she made is right for her.

[mill8277]

I wanted to do boy things all the time, I had an older brother so that was all I knew to do....but I still loved my dolls and my tea sets.......but I loved climbing trees and playing in the bushes...he may just like the color and wanna see if it will upset you...lol, how old is he....

[countrygirl12]

What would you do if your son wanted his fingernails painted pink?


 
What would you do if your daughter wanted to do something considered to be a boy thing?

I would not let a boy paint his finger nails pink.  And the daughter doing a boy thing - it depends on what they boy thing is.

My little cousin is a boy. His grandmother has encouraged him to be a girl since birth.  She encourages him to play wearing her high heel shoes.  She encourages him to want to wear girl clothes such as dresses.  This was not his choice.  It was the grandmothers.  So now he wants to do stuff like that.

[lovermont]

I would let them both do it.  Why does it matter? I wouldn't put pictures of the boy up anywhere, just in case it embarasses him later, but honestly, who cares if a boy likes the color pink and wants to paint his fingernails?

[acurtsinger2]

i wouldnt be concerned unless they were older, then i'd worry about what they think about it, not what i think about it. teenagers are confused anyway

[kapeh12]

I wouldn't have any issues either way, regardless of their age.  When they are older, I'd ask their reasons for doing so if the request seems out of character for them out of curiosity, but being older, they probably have a reason for choosing to do the activity.

When they are younger, the most likely cases are pure childhood curiosity or play - not much more.  I believe it's adults that misinterpret their motivations to "mean" something.

As a young girl growing up, I hated traditional "girly" things.  There are old home movies of me getting dolls and clearly by the look on my face I was not impressed.  I didn't like dress up, I didn't like tea parties.  I hated dresses and make-up, still do.  I had more fun riding my bike with the neighbor boys playing cops/robbers, making mud pies and building forts.  I didn't grow up "gay" as people would often think that type of behavior would imply - I'm definitely hetero.  I simply had a very logical/analytical mind and was interested in science, math and building things.  I thought the "boy" stuff was more fun and active.  Just suited my personality and interests.  Perhaps the girl wanting to do boy things will be the next astronaut, scientist, inventor.  Nothing wrong with that.

For the guy - maybe he's simply highly creative, an artist who wants to experiment.  Maybe he saw a show like Face Off on SyFy and wants to be a monster builder or makeup artist to create wonderous and scary creatures for film/TV?  Maybe he's doing it on a dare?  Maybe he has an idea for a costume for Halloween or some movie his friends are making?  Why does a color or "nail polish" (or anything) define the sexuality of a boy?  Maybe he wants to be an actor?  Maybe a scientist and heard something about nail polish and wants to see for himself?  I still recall an old movie called Kindergarden Cop where a parent was concerned their boy wanted to play with dolls...turned out the reason was the dolls got the boy close to girls in the class and he used the dolls to look under girls skirts (aka, he was acting very much like a boy).  Growing up, my brother wanted to play the flute (traditionally seen as a "girl" instrument).  The reason he wanted to initially was due to seeing the old Bugs Bunny cartoon with the dummer and the fife - he wanted to play the fife because he thought it looked cool.  Sure, he was teased by peers in middle school...but come high school...when all the other girl flute players turned into gorgeous women...then his friends were completely jealous that my brother was sitting in the middle of all these women who wanted to be his duet partner, while they were stuck surrounded by a bunch of other guys.

I think often times adults forget the general curious nature of children and project their own "fears" or assumptions onto such requests.  Just let the kid be a kid, and be available to answer any questions they ask.

[southernhorizons]

I wanted to do boy things all the time, I had an older brother so that was all I knew to do....but I still loved my dolls and my tea sets.......but I loved climbing trees and playing in the bushes...he may just like the color and wanna see if it will upset you...lol, how old is he....

I was a tomboy growing up as well, because I had two brothers right after me, and my sister was several years younger. We were always climbing trees, playing war or cops and robbers, etc. But I sure didn't grow up to be lesbian! I do think it is more common for girls to be tomboys, than for boys to be sissies, and grow up normal, but I don't know for sure.